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40 Something
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If you stopped and thought about it, would you say that your life has gradually increased or decreased in happiness during your 30’s and 40’s?
Although there has always been a spattering of happy moments, I would have to answer that in the main it has decreased. Life’s twists and turns have taken their toll, from financial pressures, parenting solo, finding and losing love more than once, moving houses and areas, starting over again and again and again.
It’s hard being human.
I’ve used the phrase ‘this too shall pass’ a lot. It has been
Although there has always been a spattering of happy moments, I would have to answer that in the main it has decreased. Life’s twists and turns have taken their toll, from financial pressures, parenting solo, finding and losing love more than once, moving houses and areas, starting over again and again and again.
It’s hard being human.
I’ve used the phrase ‘this too shall pass’ a lot. It has been
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some comfort and has reminded me to be mindful, rather than ruminating over past hurts, reacting to annoying people and feeling anxious about the future.
Research has explored the term ‘the happiness U curve.’
It has come up with possible reasons why this downward turn in happiness during adulthood occurs with a low manifesting as a ‘mid life crisis’.
The studies have shown that life satisfaction starts to decrease from early adulthood and continues to do so until middle age, the nadir being in the mid to late 40’s and only then begins to
Research has explored the term ‘the happiness U curve.’
It has come up with possible reasons why this downward turn in happiness during adulthood occurs with a low manifesting as a ‘mid life crisis’.
The studies have shown that life satisfaction starts to decrease from early adulthood and continues to do so until middle age, the nadir being in the mid to late 40’s and only then begins to
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rise again as you get older; thus the U bend analogy. The studies also showed that this was a universal phenomenon regardless of life circumstances or culture (although it has been highlighted that it is more of a western phenomenon).
There are a few dominant theories as to why this happiness U curve exists, one is economic. An article in the Guardian points out that it is the effect of work on our wellbeing and the downward side of the U curve begins in early adulthood when we enter employment. Contentment decreases as we work more and we have more
There are a few dominant theories as to why this happiness U curve exists, one is economic. An article in the Guardian points out that it is the effect of work on our wellbeing and the downward side of the U curve begins in early adulthood when we enter employment. Contentment decreases as we work more and we have more
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responsibilities and expectations to deal with. The upward curve in our 50’s is possibly due to having more time to enjoy the fruits of our labour, since the kids are older and we are perhaps more financially secure.
The other dominant theory is psychological. We start off in life with big ideas and high hopes, but we realise over time that they are likely to be unfulfilled. As we get older we gain a new sense of realism and a determination to enjoy life as it presents itself; thus an increase in happiness.
Both theories make sense to me but the
The other dominant theory is psychological. We start off in life with big ideas and high hopes, but we realise over time that they are likely to be unfulfilled. As we get older we gain a new sense of realism and a determination to enjoy life as it presents itself; thus an increase in happiness.
Both theories make sense to me but the
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psychological theory resonates with me more since it will be a while until my daughter flies the nest and I don’t feel financially secure yet. I’m still hanging on though to my big ideas and high hopes, I’m not ready to throw in the towel just yet. Maybe I need to embrace more realism but I think I will keep my suffering going until I naturally get there.
I do however have a sense of more contentment in the future coming my way. Yes I struggle with getting older, with my hair going grey and my skin ‘doing one’ in the southerly direction. Yes I
I do however have a sense of more contentment in the future coming my way. Yes I struggle with getting older, with my hair going grey and my skin ‘doing one’ in the southerly direction. Yes I
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am frustrated with not being more financially secure, I’ve taken risks in my life that have successfully given me adventures but not that much money. (I’ll take the adventures any day though). Still, I worry a little about my future finances and I have nothing but memories and shoes to hand over to my daughter. Despite these irritating niggles, I’m feeling a new energy slowly rising, a sense that everything will actually be okay some day in the near future.
If this phenomenon does exist the U-shaped bend teaches us that a mid-life slump is both
If this phenomenon does exist the U-shaped bend teaches us that a mid-life slump is both
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normal and temporary. It feels true from my perspective, perhaps this is the universes way to teach us our life lessons? A sort of long haul initiation ceremony to teach us to be a wise elder in the future? (if only our society respected wise elders more!) Maybe this knowledge can help us to relax a little knowing that this too shall pass eventually and we will find ourselves up the other side of the U bend on our way to the lighter, calmer more contented side.
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