8 Things you miss the most as a mum

Fitmumclub - 20 Jan 16

Just to clarify, I absolutely love being a mum and wouldn’t change it for the world but as most of you will know a lot changes when you become a mum and there are some things that you do miss (though pre motherhood completely take for granted).

There are so many wonderful and perfect things about motherhood, being told’mummy I love you so much’ for no reason, watching them take their first step, say their first word or staring in their first Nativity and to be honest they outweigh the things you miss, but you almost forget you ever had them. Becoming a mother for me went from 0-100mph instantly. From the moment you go home with your new baby life is completely different, you have a different set of goals, you feel like a different person and your day to day activities are almost unrecognisable from what you used to be doing. So here are eight things I miss the most since I became a mother:

1. Peeing Alone

You might laugh at this one, but if you are a parent you will get it. In the early days when I was too scared to leave Arabella on her own she would come in to the bathroom with me, or be strategically placed in view on the landing outside the bathroom. I couldn’t bear to leave her for more than a few moments when she was first born (even when she was sleeping) so this became quite a habit. Now she has been through the enjoyable and equally eventful ‘toilet training’ every time I now go to the toilet I get watched, handed the toilet paper and a pat on the back with ‘well done mummy’ as soon as I’ve successfully been. It’s so lovely that using the toilet has become a family event to congratulate each other but just sometimes I would be able to just go in there, take a moment, pee in silence and not have to answer 20 questions about why the toilet paper is white, what that mark on the wall is or where my boobies are!

2. Sleep

This one no one can prepare you for. I honestly don’t think I have had a proper lie in or slept through the night for the last three and a bit years. Even when Arabella is with her dad, my body clock set by her wake up time and has me up and ready to go (even if I’m peeling my eyes open and hanging beyond belief) at 6am every day without fail. Now she is older the wake up times can vary somewhat but the window is almost always between 6-7am (unless it’s Christmas Day, then it’s 5am!). As Children do she went through phases of sleeping well and then waking through the night so as a parent you get a lot of broken sleep. These days she does still wake up on the odd occasion either coughing, talking or falling out of her bed, but still at the slightest sound I am awake and my dressing gown is on, they aren’t lying when they say you get ‘the mothers intuition! So yes I miss the ability to sleep through the night and wake up at an acceptable time, have a lie in and feel refreshed in the morning (I guess it’s a small price to pay).

3. Grown-Up TV

Both the TV in my living room and my bedroom rarely move from the same channel…CBeebies. We have Apple TV in the living room and watch a lot of stuff on there but I honestly don’t remember the last time I watched some ‘grown-up TV’ in my house. If the TV is on (which isn’t all the time) it’s Peppa Pig, Dora, Mr Tumble (the strangest man I have ever seen) Rasta Mouse (how is this programme even allowed to be aired!?) or that annoying woman from Mini Beast adventures, Jess. I just want to watch the news or the Kardashians or even Good Morning Britain for a bit of trash. But no, if the channel on rare occasion changes she is on it like a hawk ‘mummy what is this? I don’t like this one!’. So yes Grown-up TV is sorely missed. You might wonder why I don’t take my chance in the evenings when she is in bed and that’s because most evenings I’m either working out or writing blogs in the office whilst I have the chance.

4. Tidiness

I am well and truly on the OCD spectrum and run a very tight ship when it comes to tidiness in my house. I cannot deal with mess, dirt or disorganisation as you will see in my Home Tour Vlog and to keep on top of this standard I tidy up about 385 times a day. We try and keep a rule that we only play with one thing at a time otherwise I turn around and every surface is covered in some sort of activity or collection of My Little Ponies. Arabella (bless her heart) regularly likes to pull out the ‘I’m too tired to help mummy’ to which we have to do a little bit of bargaining with but more often than not she does always end up at least helping mummy. I am a tidy person and sometimes it can be exhausting constantly tidying up behind a small little person who has no spacial awareness and will spread as far as her toy box will allow her (And yes Playdoh is the worst culpret, it goes everywhere, gets congealed in to fabric and as for the mixing of colours, don’t even go there **sigh**).

5. Taking a bath without Barbie

Baths are my thing, I’m not a fan of showering but would much prefer to have a good old soak in the bath. A morning or day bath is always a must otherwise with hair the thickness of a horses tail I will be blowdrying until the early hours of the morning. The only drawback to this routine is the excitement on Arabella’s face when she hears me turn the tap on, either because she wants to come in and pinch my nippes (what a treat for mummy) or it’s an opportunity to get all of her 75 Barbies out to play with mummy in the bath. Don’t get me wrong I don’t mind a bit of Barbie role play but sometimes you just want to lie in the bath immersed in the water relaxing without Barbie’s shoe spiking you in inappropriate places.

6. Drinking a whole cup of Tea

If you manage this, please contact me because you deserve a medal. I honestly don’t remember the last time I drank a whole cup of tea before either it went cold or got knocked over. You fancy one, you make it you take that lovely first sip and then your gone. Something gets spilled, the programme on Netflix has ended, the dogs need to go out, she can’t get her shoe off, she want’s a drink or she is having a moment. You’re gone, that beautifully warm cup of tea is left on the side and forgotten about until you eventually remember half an hour later and you go back to find it cold and unappetising. What a waste and no wonder I get so dehydrated!

7. Driving my Car Legally

This is one of my worst ones. I honestly don’t know whey they haven’t banned children in cars (a joke obviously) I can understand why smoking, drinking and eating behind the wheel can be a distraction but have the people that make these rules ever tried driving anywhere with a toddler in their car. ‘mummy I’ve dropped my toy’ ‘mummy I need a drink’ ‘mummy I need a wee wee’ ‘mummy the straps are hurting me’ ‘mummy’ ‘mummy’ ‘mummy’ I won’t go on. Driving with a toddler in the car is one of the hardest things going. If she was in the front it would be a whole lot easier and I would probably spend a lot more time with my eyes on the road rather than in my rear view mirror making sure she’s not strangling herself with the seatbelt. But tucked away on the back seat you end up pulling over every 50 yards because she has dropped something, wants something or just wants you to hold her hand. Most would say just leave her and she will learn but if you are driving more than 2 miles then you are just going to have to deal with the objection to being ignored which is as distracting. I used to enjoy just driving around with my music on (potentially louder than it should be) taking in the world, having some thinking time and arriving relaxed and refreshed. This is in a dream world and doesn’t happen if you are a parent, half of the time I forget where I am even going!

8. Making a phone Call

‘Mummy who is it?’ ‘Can I talk to them’ ‘Is it Aunite Cesca?’ ‘Is she coming to my house’ ‘Look at my teddy’ (Arabella thinks people can see through their phones). Making a phone call with a child in the background is nigh on impossible, you can’t hear, you are distracted because two people are talking to you at once. If you’re lucky and there is a lock on your bathroom that can give you long enough to get the gist of the conversation but then little knocks start on the door. Basically the easiest thing to do is to leave a mum a voicemail and expect a call back sometime within the next week!

So there is it, I hope mums you can relate and everyone else you now have an insight in to the things you appreciate whilst you are a single entity. Don’t get me wrong I love my life now and most days you can just have a chukkle when you get out of the bath to find Barbie’s tiara tangled in to your hair but it’s just a little insight in to #mumlife.

Thanks for reading xx

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