A few non profound universal truths for parents of under three year olds…
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Here is a little list I have drawn up of non profound things I have learnt whilst parenting under threes.
Standing behind the kitchen wall eating a biscuit is an act of rebellion.
You will try to make a wax seal out of the Babybel casing and consider it an early years history lesson.
When you lift that warm cup of coffee or tea to your lips, the baby WILL wake up!
A lie in means until 8am.
A toilet break on your own is akin to a spa session.
If in doubt – rice cake.
If you think it’s a poo let it brew. You could risk a
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follow on poo sans nappy or in a fresh nappy and that’s mess or 15p thereabouts.
Stickers work as incentives … Then they don’t.
That expression of joy and a look that says ’I’m really pleased with myself’ is often followed by a fall and howling.
You would never have known before kids that a toddler hiding under a table or wrapping themselves in a curtain is not always a charming game of hide and seek. It could actually be your little one doing a poo in their nappy or pants.
That little ’humpf’ or petulant outburst they do when they
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are in a controlled strop is what YOU do! They are playing you by playing you!
The nail varnish on your toes has become a scientific experiment measuring the rate at which your toenails grow, using the line of your last application one evening in June as the starting point.
The remote control toy you bought doesn’t deter your baby from playing with the real remote control and messing with CBeebies when the older one is watching it and you are trying to cook dinner or eat that biscuit behind the kitchen wall. And if you think giving the baby an old
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remote without batteries to play with might work, it won’t.
So, when you think the growth spurts are further apart and clothes will last longer than three months, the knees go and that bumper pack of paints you have, stains clothes.
That’s what I have got, bet you have some, maybe some are ’universal truths’!
Featured Image – Copyright Mr Scruff
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Siroon Gassia - 10 Jan 16
Here is a little list I have drawn up of non profound things I have learnt whilst parenting under threes.
Standing behind the kitchen wall eating a biscuit is an act of rebellion.
You will try to make a wax seal out of the Babybel casing and consider it an early years history lesson.
When you lift that warm cup of coffee or tea to your lips, the baby WILL wake up!
A lie in means until 8am.
A toilet break on your own is akin to a spa session.
If in doubt – rice cake.
If you think it’s a poo let it brew. You could risk a follow on poo sans nappy or in a fresh nappy and that’s mess or 15p thereabouts.
Stickers work as incentives … Then they don’t.
That expression of joy and a look that says ‘I’m really pleased with myself’ is often followed by a fall and howling.
You would never have known before kids that a toddler hiding under a table or wrapping themselves in a curtain is not always a charming game of hide and seek. It could actually be your little one doing a poo in their nappy or pants.
That little ‘humpf’ or petulant outburst they do when they are in a controlled strop is what YOU do! They are playing you by playing you!
The nail varnish on your toes has become a scientific experiment measuring the rate at which your toenails grow, using the line of your last application one evening in June as the starting point.
The remote control toy you bought doesn’t deter your baby from playing with the real remote control and messing with CBeebies when the older one is watching it and you are trying to cook dinner or eat that biscuit behind the kitchen wall. And if you think giving the baby an old remote without batteries to play with might work, it won’t.
So, when you think the growth spurts are further apart and clothes will last longer than three months, the knees go and that bumper pack of paints you have, stains clothes.
That’s what I have got, bet you have some, maybe some are ‘universal truths’!
Featured Image – Copyright Mr Scruff
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