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As a firm EU ’Remain’ supporter, I am becoming increasingly concerned that The Toddlers may, in fact, be Brexit sympathisers. There are clear signs to support this theory.
1. The Toddlers are always very upset when other toddlers, toddlers who are not them, come over here and take their toys. Even if they didn’t want the toy and were playing with something else. Even if the toy was not, in fact, theirs.
2. The Toddlers are not happy about Parents taking away their sovereignty. They feel that Parents are constantly telling them what they can and
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can’t do. They believe that they should be in charge of their own decision making. Toddler rule for toddler people!
3. The Toddlers object to anyone who wishes to impose regulations, however sensible, upon them. They are sick of all these directives about wearing two shoes, not playing in the traffic, not chewing the cat’s tail… It’s just endless, ridiculous restrictions and red tape.
4. The Toddlers have a slight tendency to make up ’facts’. The entirely fabricated nature of what they are saying in no way undermines the passion with which
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they are saying it.
5. The Toddlers are opposed to being told that they can not discriminate against people on unreasonable grounds. The Toddlers enjoy discriminating against people for no good reason.
6. Despite The Toddlers’ desire to restrict the movement of other people into their territory (because they are not willing to share their toys), The Toddlers themselves intend to continue to move freely into others’ territories. The Toddlers do not see anything wrong with this policy.
7. Upon arrival in someone else’s territory, The Toddlers
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like to speak loudly, demand to be provided with their favourite foods, and recreate an environment that looks exactly like the one they just left.
8. The Toddlers won’t stand for anyone wanting to mess with their bananas. Even though no one is actually trying to mess with their bananas, the toddlers remain wary and indignant. They like their bananas just the way they are.
9. The Toddlers sometimes feel very suspicious of random people. People who have come from another house. They’re not sure why, but they are very sure those people are
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suspicious and should be made to leave. The Toddlers will change who they are suspicious of on a whim.
10. The Toddlers have a vague sense that the world should be revolving around them because they are very important. They are not entirely able to justify this opinion, but are prepared to shout very loudly about it.
11. The Toddlers rarely care if no one agrees with them, and the actual evidence is not exactly in their favour: they are still right, and they are going to stamp their feet to prove it.
12. The Toddlers feel this way despite all
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the benefits and assistance they receive from Parents. And despite all the joy they actually get in sharing toys and bananas.
13. The Toddlers feel this way despite the lack of any realistic plan for how they would manage on their own.
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Silly Mummy - 21 Jun 16
As a firm EU ‘Remain’ supporter, I am becoming increasingly concerned that The Toddlers may, in fact, be Brexit sympathisers. There are clear signs to support this theory.
1. The Toddlers are always very upset when other toddlers, toddlers who are not them, come over here and take their toys. Even if they didn’t want the toy and were playing with something else. Even if the toy was not, in fact, theirs.
2. The Toddlers are not happy about Parents taking away their sovereignty. They feel that Parents are constantly telling them what they can and can’t do. They believe that they should be in charge of their own decision making. Toddler rule for toddler people!
3. The Toddlers object to anyone who wishes to impose regulations, however sensible, upon them. They are sick of all these directives about wearing two shoes, not playing in the traffic, not chewing the cat’s tail… It’s just endless, ridiculous restrictions and red tape.
4. The Toddlers have a slight tendency to make up ‘facts’. The entirely fabricated nature of what they are saying in no way undermines the passion with which they are saying it.
5. The Toddlers are opposed to being told that they can not discriminate against people on unreasonable grounds. The Toddlers enjoy discriminating against people for no good reason.
6. Despite The Toddlers’ desire to restrict the movement of other people into their territory (because they are not willing to share their toys), The Toddlers themselves intend to continue to move freely into others’ territories. The Toddlers do not see anything wrong with this policy.
7. Upon arrival in someone else’s territory, The Toddlers like to speak loudly, demand to be provided with their favourite foods, and recreate an environment that looks exactly like the one they just left.
8. The Toddlers won’t stand for anyone wanting to mess with their bananas. Even though no one is actually trying to mess with their bananas, the toddlers remain wary and indignant. They like their bananas just the way they are.
9. The Toddlers sometimes feel very suspicious of random people. People who have come from another house. They’re not sure why, but they are very sure those people are suspicious and should be made to leave. The Toddlers will change who they are suspicious of on a whim.
10. The Toddlers have a vague sense that the world should be revolving around them because they are very important. They are not entirely able to justify this opinion, but are prepared to shout very loudly about it.
11. The Toddlers rarely care if no one agrees with them, and the actual evidence is not exactly in their favour: they are still right, and they are going to stamp their feet to prove it.
12. The Toddlers feel this way despite all the benefits and assistance they receive from Parents. And despite all the joy they actually get in sharing toys and bananas.
13. The Toddlers feel this way despite the lack of any realistic plan for how they would manage on their own.
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I am a stay at home mum to two young girls (born spring 2013 and summer 2014). I blog as Silly Mummy, over at R is for Hoppit. I mostly tell humorous (I like to think) tales of things my daughters’ have said and done. Being completely honest, I am largely coasting on the comedy genius of my toddler, here. Hey, what is she going to do about it? I am the boss - I control the raisins. I also write random humorous posts, and occasional serious posts on parenting issues, just to mix it up a bit.
You can follow my utter failure to understand Twitter @sillymummy88, and my incompetence at managing a Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/risforhoppit/
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