Cut yourself some Christmas slack

Chocolate and Wine is the Solution - 18 Dec 16

It’s all a bit too much nowadays isn’t it? I love the vibe of Christmas, in a world where there is little peace and harmony it’s a nice idea, in theory of course.

But as a parent in 2016 it’s all just gone a bit far me thinks. The enormous barrage of Christmas to do’s grows every year and puts us parents under more undue pressure. The days of seeing Santa at the school fair, getting a selection box given to you and feeling you’ve ticked that experience off the list are far gone. These days they want us to do more, to list but a few; real life reindeer, fake snow, texts and videos from the big guy, christmas jumpers (n.b I love these and I am ever so jealous they weren’t the done thing in 1985), gifts for all teachers, helpers and anyone your child comes into contact with, the polar express or at least something authentic and for many a trip all the way to Lapland circa £1000 plus …. more and more expectation and we loving caring parents feel the pressure to do it.

What next I ask you?

Now don’t mention the god damn elf on the bloody shelf. Schools do them (good behaviour control tool), and I can guarantee 90% of their classmates have one too now. I’m in the midst of this right now people and I tell you it’s not pretty at times. Your Facebook feed will become filled with pictures of various elf escapades leaving you feel ever so slightly failing if you’ve not joined in. And woah betide if you have said elf and you forget to move the bloody thing…….. another parenting fail to add to the christmas guilt box! Pinterest has a lot to answer for that’s all I’m saying.

It’s all lovely you see and I’m not knocking it but what I’m trying to say is cut yourself some slack. We all know that Christmas can be a difficult time for many, it’s a time we feel sad at the loss of those who were with us on Christmas’s past, we might be facing a christmas without a partner, dealing with a split family, coping with illness either personally or a family member. Many will struggle with the financial and emotional burden of it all. Add in all these additional demands listed above and it’s no wonder emotions are heightened at this time of year. Not everyone is coping and if you feel you aren’t, talk to someone and don’t worry about the minutiae of elves, presents and perfecting everything.

As someone who worries about everything all the time, my Christmas message is do your own thing. Your little ones will not care if the Santa they see isn’t sat next to a roaring fire with three elves in the depths of snow. They won’t care if the elf doesn’t move, he’s on holiday right? He’s chilling out! Don’t worry if you don’t have the resources in spirit or in finances to do all of the above…… Ask yourself what does Christmas mean to you? My children are safe, they are not waking up underneath a building that’s collapsed due to bombing, they have each other and they have us.. Yes the elf’s a lazy so and so, they haven’t been to Lapland and the house doesn’t look like Kevin’s in Home Alone but they will be happy. We’ll argue over who won the board games, the kids won’t eat their meal, we’ll giggle at funny gifts and I dare say the teenager will strop off to her room after I’ve told her for the hundredth time to “get off her bloody phone”. But that’s the vibe I like, it’s family, it’s whatever is important to you.

So do what you can with who you can, have a big hug (they’re free and very effective), don’t over commit yourself, breathe and try to enjoy the bits you can. Merry Christmas all x

Chocolate and Wine is the Solution

I'm a multitasking anxious Momma to 3 and I have got my writing mojo back!

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