Dressed to Impress?

Victoria Ruddick - 11 Apr 16

So I need to be careful that this comes across in the right way…

Are we as mothers always worried what others are thinking? Especially what other mothers think about you? The way you dress? The way your children are dressed?

When Luella was a wee little one, I started going to a little sing song group at the local library, it was free and close to home so I thought it would something nice for us to do. I found myself feeling nervous being surrounded by other mothers en masse. What were they thinking of me? I’m the only one here without a wedding ring? Am I dressed appropriately? What even is a yummy mummy?

I know this sounds a little ridiculous, as these people are complete strangers and we had all come to this class to sing nursery rhymes and bounce our babies up and down. As classes went on I’d get the little “Hellos” when walking in and little conversations between songs regarding my little Lu. But as all mothers wheeled out in force heading to the local coffee shops I would find myself feeling a little down. How can a little library group make me feel like the first day of school?! Every week I would perfectly lay out an outfit for Luella overthinking it all, even down to the socks. May I say nowadays the last of my worries is socks. I’m lucky if a sock is even considered! But at the time this meant a great deal to me, I felt like a young mother and thought I was being judged, therefore if my daughter was dressed in lovely dungarees and twee shirt I would then come across more respectable.

Over time new mothers came along and I found myself watching them, they looked slightly nervous and out of place. They didn’t yet know the words to ” Wind the Bobbin Up” so felt a little awkward. I found comfort in observing these ladies and then realised that were we all in the same boat? I wasn’t yet convinced.

My wardrobe was beginning to change into what I thought a new mother should wear. Safe to say my stripy t-shirt collection grew, I was wearing leather boots and nice knitwear. Things I wouldn’t have really considered before, but I wanted to look sensible and responsible. In the summer I would become paranoid about my tattoos showing and always considered taking my lip piercing out. My hair was natural even though I would’ve loved to scalp bleach it and pop on some blusher.

My face was becoming more well known at the library and even now the coffee shops, my nerves were disappearing and I would happily sing at the top of my voice, knowing that Luella found it hilarious (she’d tell me off now!). It became our little thing that we did together and her interaction with other little ones her age was fascinating.

As time went on I became more confident in myself as a mother and realised that “I have got this!”. It really didn’t matter what I wore or what Lu was wearing. We needed to create our own little identity as a family, so there it began.

As I became more relaxed my confidence grew, I would be the one to say the “Hellos” at the group and even started more groups. Where I have made some wonderfully great friends, our children are growing up together and it’s a blessing.

My stripy t-shirt collection is still rather grand but they’re teamed with my holey favourite dungarees and over worn trainers. I wear a bow in my hair and pink lipstick.

I love that there are mothers out there sharing their confidence, inspiring other new and not so new mamas to feel themselves and great in whatever they decide to wear. Don’t waste your time, or pennies, on something that you don’t feel comfortable in or you think will make you fit in.

Being a parent will make you fit in, no matter your age, background, bank balance we all have sleepless nights and baby food in our hair.

I do still lay out Luella’s clothes because I find it enjoyable, needless to say she never wears what I lay out. She’s now created her own style, heaven forbid!

Our bags are full of the same crap wether it be a Louis or a Kanken. We have all got this❤ xxx

Victoria Ruddick

Mama of 2 living by the sea. Instagram- lumpsandmoose

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