Excuse me while I make an assumption

Amy - 7 May 16

Isn’t it funny how a simple picture can set off so many assumptions?

Now, I’m a self confessed Instagram addict and I love all the good things Social Media can do but let’s face it, the temptation to make assumptions is bigger than ever!

Our ten year old has joined a chat group with her friends on her iPod and we’ve been through the etiquette of texting and the context of texts messages (just because they haven’t replied doesn’t mean they hate you, they’re probably just having tea) but I’ve recently started to think about when our girls are eventually on social media and how to explain the way it can be so misleading.

You can post a picture online and two and two can easily become five.

Last year I deleted my Facebook account for a breather, although as I couldn’t face going completely cold turkey I kept Instagram.

What happened after that changed my thoughts on my social media use and the online world I had created;

Firstly, I had major FOMO (fear of missing out). I was offline for a good few months and probably had FOMO for half of that time!!!

Then I had major guilt. I suddenly had loads of free time. I must have scrolled half my life (and my children’s life) away! Eeek!

What stayed with me the most though was people’s reactions and assumptions.

A few people made the effort to talk to me in person, enquiring why I was offline and others made assumptions that I was off the radar because I had been having a fabulous time without them, busying myself having loads of fun rather than the actual graft of work and family life that was really happening.

I had posted a couple of ‘fun’ pictures on Instagram, obviously not thinking my life would be judged on these few pictures.

Not long after this I came across Lucy Sheridan on Instagram.

Lucy’s hashtag is #comparisonfree and she coaches people on all the feelings that come up with using social media, the comparisons, assumptions, being overwhelmed. She has been involved with MothersMeetings and posted on parenting comparison, when mums in particular are at their most vulnerable – those sleep deprived moments when your on your fifth feed of the night scrolling through your newsfeed – It’s easy to get sucked in.

What people post on Social Media is a tiny snapshot of a few moments of someone’s life.

Theres always more to what you see. Always two sides to a story.

I think losing the art of real life communication means people jump to assumptions so much more and it’s such a shame, it’s stops us being there for each other and recently has resulted in a lot of young people feeling pressured from their online life.

I’m probably online more now but hopefully for the right reasons and with the right mindset. I love scrolling through my Instagram feed, it’s filled with positive pictures from people I know I’ll be inspired from. I try to keep in mind the affect my own posts might have on others and keep MOST of them real life (ok I don’t have pancakes for every breakfast and I’ll probably never post my many baskets of washing and ironing!).

We blog as a family as we try to slowly introduce our children to the online world.

Hopefully we can teach them to understand that what is posted online is not completely real life and not to take it personally.

Instead, to use it as a means to celebrate their friends and each other, to learn from their online peers and take as much positivity from it as they can.

Communication is key and I’m definitely going to make it a priority going forward!

For Lucy’s MothersMeetings post follow the link: http://mothers-meeting.com/never-ever-compare-yourself-by-lucy-sheridan/

Amy

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