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Feminism and my boy

1
I write a blog called Musings of a Wild Woman and I refer to my husband throughout my blog as Mr Wild Woman.

http://www.musingsofawildwoman.com/

 

 
“A feminist is anyone who recognizes the equality and full humanity of women and men.”  Gloria Steinem
 

Mr Wild Woman told me that he was a feminist pretty soon after meeting me

I was mostly convinced, not fully to be honest

I knew he fancied me

I knew he really, really liked me

He thought I was hot (he is human after all)

He knew I was about to move to

SelfishMother.com
2
Manchester when we met and that I was planning to do a Masters degree in Feminism

So even though he told me he was a feminist

I was hesitant to fully believe him

That was nearly sixteen years ago

 

My journey with feminism has been complex, not always rewarding and it has certainly not always been easy

But the truth is if I was a stick of rock I would have feminist written right through me

To me feminism is humanity

It is a very strong part of my identity

Feminism is equality

Feminism is respecting and celebrating

SelfishMother.com
3
difference

Feminism is individuality

Feminism is egalitarianism

Feminism is treating people well

Feminism is making sure that our most vulnerable have a voice

Feminism is not about hating men, it is not connected to hate in any way (it is interesting how many people hold this misconception)

Feminism can be angry (anger is not hate)

But that anger is often rooted in injustice and frustration

 

To me feminism is love

The love of people

The love of women

The love of men

The love of people who love and respect

SelfishMother.com
4
other people

The love of life

The love of love

But feminism, like all other things, has evolved

And so has my relationship with it

It is continually evolving

As am I

 

I am a strong woman

I am an empowered woman

I am a very privileged woman

I am woman who has been very fortunate to give birth to two incredible young women

I am a woman who believes the future is bright because of these incredible young women and their incredible friends

I believe that feminism is one of the things that will make this world

SelfishMother.com
5
better

Feminism amongst many other things

Feminism challenges norms

It obliterates stereotypes

It holds floodlights up to discrimination

It strives to protect the oppressed against further oppression

And it lifts, supports and encourages those who are pushing for better days in the most brilliant ways

 

When Mr Wild Woman told me he was a feminist, I raised an eyebrow and said nothing (yes this did happen, but as I said it was sixteen years ago)

He was the first man I ever heard embrace and own that word as a part of their

SelfishMother.com
6
identity (I have heard several other men do it since, but this was sixteen years ago and when I had just arrived in Brighton)

Even though Mr Wild Woman has been an arsehole at times and his behaviour may not have been conducive to my beliefs and my expectations of a feminist

I believe he is a feminist

I believe Mr Wild Woman is a (quietly) raging feminist

I know he adores women

I know he treats me the same as he would anybody else

We have disagreed over many, many, many, many (you get the picture) things but these were never about

SelfishMother.com
7
whether I was a woman or not

We met as two people

We fell in love as two people who happened to fall hard for each other

When he is annoyed with me about stuff it never has anything to do with my gender

He has never pulled the “women should” card

It wouldn’t occur to him

Actually if the truth be told I have pulled more gender stereotype bullshit over the years than he ever has (I’m still learning and unlearning too, we are never done, I’m an imperfect person and I get it wrong)

 

Men should own feminism too

Men

SelfishMother.com
8
should feel comfortable calling themselves feminists because all it tells me is they love and respect people, men and women

They care about humanity

Mr Wild Woman buys my tampons without even thinking about it

He cooks 90% of my meals (Lily pretty much cooks the other 10%)

He irons occasionally (I don’t know how to use it and nobody wants me to for fear I turn it on and forget about it)

He warns me about rogue facial hair sightings (nobody told me or prepared me for that shit)

He makes me feel like a goddess by the way he looks at

SelfishMother.com
9
me

He supports me with all my schemes, ideas, plottings, courses and detours

He has never judged me on my weight, my looks or my body

He has judged me purely on my arsehole behaviour and I his too

He is an incredible role model for the girls

And he knows they are watching it all

They see how we are

They see what we do

They see our mistakes

But they know that they should only accept love no matter who they are with

No matter what the relationship is

Only let the love and light in

And if their partner is not a

SelfishMother.com
10
feminist

Then they soon will be

Or else they won’t last long

Feminism makes sense if you love people

 

Because to me feminism is love

Feminism is about making the world better for everyone

Why would you not want that?

Have a lovely day

Love

Lou
“We need to reclaim the word ’feminism’. We need the word ’feminism’ back real bad. When statistics come in saying that only 29% of American women would describe themselves as feminist – and only 42% of British women – I used to think, What do you think feminism IS,

SelfishMother.com
11
ladies? What part of ’liberation for women’ is not for you? Is it freedom to vote? The right not to be owned by the man you marry? The campaign for equal pay? ’Vogue’ by Madonna? Jeans? Did all that good shit GET ON YOUR NERVES? Or were you just DRUNK AT THE TIME OF THE SURVEY?” Caitlin Moran
SelfishMother.com

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- 18 Apr 18

I write a blog called Musings of a Wild Woman and I refer to my husband throughout my blog as Mr Wild Woman.

http://www.musingsofawildwoman.com/

 

 

“A feminist is anyone who recognizes the equality and full humanity of women and men.”  Gloria Steinem

 

Mr Wild Woman told me that he was a feminist pretty soon after meeting me

I was mostly convinced, not fully to be honest

I knew he fancied me

I knew he really, really liked me

He thought I was hot (he is human after all)

He knew I was about to move to Manchester when we met and that I was planning to do a Masters degree in Feminism

So even though he told me he was a feminist

I was hesitant to fully believe him

That was nearly sixteen years ago

 

My journey with feminism has been complex, not always rewarding and it has certainly not always been easy

But the truth is if I was a stick of rock I would have feminist written right through me

To me feminism is humanity

It is a very strong part of my identity

Feminism is equality

Feminism is respecting and celebrating difference

Feminism is individuality

Feminism is egalitarianism

Feminism is treating people well

Feminism is making sure that our most vulnerable have a voice

Feminism is not about hating men, it is not connected to hate in any way (it is interesting how many people hold this misconception)

Feminism can be angry (anger is not hate)

But that anger is often rooted in injustice and frustration

 

To me feminism is love

The love of people

The love of women

The love of men

The love of people who love and respect other people

The love of life

The love of love

But feminism, like all other things, has evolved

And so has my relationship with it

It is continually evolving

As am I

 

I am a strong woman

I am an empowered woman

I am a very privileged woman

I am woman who has been very fortunate to give birth to two incredible young women

I am a woman who believes the future is bright because of these incredible young women and their incredible friends

I believe that feminism is one of the things that will make this world better

Feminism amongst many other things

Feminism challenges norms

It obliterates stereotypes

It holds floodlights up to discrimination

It strives to protect the oppressed against further oppression

And it lifts, supports and encourages those who are pushing for better days in the most brilliant ways

 

When Mr Wild Woman told me he was a feminist, I raised an eyebrow and said nothing (yes this did happen, but as I said it was sixteen years ago)

He was the first man I ever heard embrace and own that word as a part of their identity (I have heard several other men do it since, but this was sixteen years ago and when I had just arrived in Brighton)

Even though Mr Wild Woman has been an arsehole at times and his behaviour may not have been conducive to my beliefs and my expectations of a feminist

I believe he is a feminist

I believe Mr Wild Woman is a (quietly) raging feminist

I know he adores women

I know he treats me the same as he would anybody else

We have disagreed over many, many, many, many (you get the picture) things but these were never about whether I was a woman or not

We met as two people

We fell in love as two people who happened to fall hard for each other

When he is annoyed with me about stuff it never has anything to do with my gender

He has never pulled the “women should” card

It wouldn’t occur to him

Actually if the truth be told I have pulled more gender stereotype bullshit over the years than he ever has (I’m still learning and unlearning too, we are never done, I’m an imperfect person and I get it wrong)

 

Men should own feminism too

Men should feel comfortable calling themselves feminists because all it tells me is they love and respect people, men and women

They care about humanity

Mr Wild Woman buys my tampons without even thinking about it

He cooks 90% of my meals (Lily pretty much cooks the other 10%)

He irons occasionally (I don’t know how to use it and nobody wants me to for fear I turn it on and forget about it)

He warns me about rogue facial hair sightings (nobody told me or prepared me for that shit)

He makes me feel like a goddess by the way he looks at me

He supports me with all my schemes, ideas, plottings, courses and detours

He has never judged me on my weight, my looks or my body

He has judged me purely on my arsehole behaviour and I his too

He is an incredible role model for the girls

And he knows they are watching it all

They see how we are

They see what we do

They see our mistakes

But they know that they should only accept love no matter who they are with

No matter what the relationship is

Only let the love and light in

And if their partner is not a feminist

Then they soon will be

Or else they won’t last long

Feminism makes sense if you love people

 

Because to me feminism is love

Feminism is about making the world better for everyone

Why would you not want that?

Have a lovely day

Love

Lou

“We need to reclaim the word ‘feminism’. We need the word ‘feminism’ back real bad. When statistics come in saying that only 29% of American women would describe themselves as feminist – and only 42% of British women – I used to think, What do you think feminism IS, ladies? What part of ‘liberation for women’ is not for you? Is it freedom to vote? The right not to be owned by the man you marry? The campaign for equal pay? ‘Vogue’ by Madonna? Jeans? Did all that good shit GET ON YOUR NERVES? Or were you just DRUNK AT THE TIME OF THE SURVEY?” Caitlin Moran

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