Here in Oxfordshire half term is coming to an end. At 7.30 Friday evening I was strolling downstairs in my onesie (yes I own a onesie, yes I put it on well before bed, don’t judge me) congratulating myself on an accomplished day. The dinner was in the oven ready to be served piping hot to my husband when he finally made it home, both children were tucked up in bed sleeping soundly. I had just put away my last of three loads of laundry and the toys had all been tidied up. Oddly I had the sensation I had a lot more to do but was able to brush it off as, actually, I didn’t. I had done everything on my list so could in fact relax. Why aren’t all evenings like this? I can sum it up in one word… School.

As schooling goes we would be considered ameteurs, beginners for sure. My daughter started reception in September, we are not even a year into it and I have already developed a deep self loathing on school days. I get tired of the sound of my own voice;

‘ Shoes, where are your shoes?’ 

‘Turn the TV off, now is not the time.’ 

‘Why are you not dressed!?’  

‘Oh my god it’s ten past, right, we are going to be late!’ 

Beginners we may be, but we are also far enough into the school year for the novelty of school to have really worn off. My daughter has over a mile to walk to school every day. She is SO over sitting down to learn things and very much just wants to play solidly, reading is a chore now she has learnt how to do it and she is constantly ill. I’m not talking about anything major, but the poor kid has picked up every single cold going around since September. She is constantly run down and by the end of each half term has luggage under her eyes and turns into a stroppy teenager, just 8 years too early…

School also has the ability to instil a certain amount of fear into you as a parent. A few weeks ago we were threatened with an attendance letter! Should my daughter have any more days of sick she will drop below 93 percent attendance and will therefore receive a letter. A letter. I am so scared… But honestly, my daughter is. ‘I don’t want to get a letter mummy, I will go to school’. If schools stopped threatening kids and parents with fines and letters for non attendance then perhaps they would actually stick to the school’s 48 hour sickness policy (for non parents- you need to keep your kid off 48 hours after last bout of sickness as they are still contagious in this time). I know most parents don’t stick to this and so the vom bug travels through school like wildfire. Thanks! Though can you blame them- if you do stick to it then you darling gets sent home from school with a threatening letter instead. My daughter would not have had so many viruses if other kids were kept off until they were no longer contagious and therefore her attendance would not be so ‘bad’.

Tardiness, that’s another of their favourite threats and so we endeavour to be on time for school every single day. And this is what turns me into a bad mother. Seriously, I barely ever yelled at my children before school started and now it is a daily occurrence. Trust me, trying to get two small children dressed, fed and out the door by ten past 8 to walk a mile and a half to school in  all  weathers is not my idea of fun.