HOW NOT TO SPEND IT

Molly Gunn, Editor - 4 Nov 23

I vowed I wouldn’t write another blog until I finished my novel, but it seems this one couldn’t wait. Yes, I’m writing a novel! It’s taken me a year, as it’s on spec, with no advance. I’ve written in snatched moments – paragraphs at 5.30am, a brain dump before bed – as my ‘working time’ (aka school hours) is reserved for ‘earning money.’ Bills don’t stop coming for aspiring novelists! 

If only I had savings, I’ve thought: imagine how many novels I could whizz out if I wasn’t worrying about the mortgage? A room of one’s own, and all that.

Truth is: I’ve never saved. I’m someone who – as my mother puts it – ‘spends money like it’s going out of fashion.’ Indeed, many of the clothes I spent money on have long gone out of fashion – I see you, Diesel hipster jeans. While others, such as Juicy tracksuits have come back in again. 

I was brought up to ‘waste not, want not’ but it didn’t stick. When, aged 13, I got an evening job in a kitchen, I rebelled against my parents’ frugality. I spent my earnings swiftly on HMV CDs, Athena posters, Woolworths pick’n’mix. 

In my late teens, my Grandpa died. He left his grandchildren £15k each. My siblings both used theirs as a deposit on their first home. Me? “Buying a house sounds boring. I’ll carry on renting and have… fun!” 

It was 1999, and property prices rocketed soon afterwards. Turns out, I’d shot myself in my Miu Miu clad foot. My inheritance was enjoyed, but not spent ‘wisely.’ I rented for the next 17 years, albeit with a lovey knitwear collection.

Tom and I finally bought our first property in 2016, and it took a while, as haven’t had consistent income since 2007. I left a PAYE job at ES Magazine as ‘Shopping Editor’ (yes, really) to become a freelance journalist, and have existed month-to-month since. That equates to 200 months of hustling, to pay bills, and furnish a wine and posh crisps habit. 

I’ve earned, I’ve spent. No wonder I’m proud of donating £1 Million from Selfish Mother to charities: I know how easily that money could have been frittered on business perks, an Apple Mac here, an Anthropologie chair there.

These days, I earn less, and I still spend: Prime drinks, Ulez fees, newspapers, Council Tax, croissants, school lunches, Disney +, school clubs, new jeans, the mortgage…

Recently though, I’m curious about life on the other side. I’m in awe of astute friends: one who won’t buy herself small treats (like a coffee); one who diligently searches Ebay instead of Amazon; one who doesn’t turn on the heating – at all – in winter (opting for wood fires, and layers instead). Those are conscious choices. I want to be more conscious, too.

The words ‘financial literacy’ pop into my head like a buzz phrase. Why isn’t this taught at school? I want to start teaching myself, aged 46. Last week, I had a conversation with a pension fund guy, who asked “Do you really want to be living month to month when you’re 66?” Answer. No, I don’t. 

Suddenly I feel like wising up. I’m enamoured with Instagram accounts such as @MyFrugalYear @HerFirst100K and @ShedoesMoney. Ladies who talk about the power of not spending. Of spending wisely. Empowering women to invest. To grow their money!

I’m inspired. I’ve opened a savings account. £350, so far, it’s a start. I’m rekindling a neglected pension fund, too. I’m asking, ‘do I really need that?’ I’m looking at debt head on. 

Where do I want to be when I’m 66? I don’t want to ‘retire’ in the old fashioned sense, but I’d like to be writing novels, mortgage free, a positive bank balance and a financial cushion. I’d like to travel freely, eat well, pay bills on time, live minimally, and help my children flourish.

When I imagine that future, being financially astute and frugal doesn’t sound boring at all. All I need to do in the short term is learn how not to spend it. Although, I might make an exception for wine and posh crisps. 

Molly Gunn, Editor

Molly Gunn is the founder and editor of Selfish Mother, a site she created for like-minded women in 2013. Molly has been a journalist for over 15 years, starting out working on fashion desks at The Guardian, The Telegraph & ES Magazine before going freelance in 2006 to write for quality publications. She now edits Selfish Mother, sells #GoodTees to raise funds for charity, & writes freelance for Red Magazine and The Sunday Telegraph's Stella. Molly is mother to Rafferty, 6, Fox, 4, and baby Liberty. She is married to Tom aka music producer Tee Mango and founder of Millionhands. They live in Bruton, Somerset.

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