Is it my fault? #mumguilt to the max
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Today I was browsing sippy cups as I prepare to wean my youngest girl, and found myself paying over the odds for some kinda magic, no spill, beaker, rather than anything with a spout.
Why? Mum guilt had reared its ugly head. I’ve once read that use of sippy cups means tongue/teeth misplacement and can lead to imprecise articulation. Once was enough for me to instantly blame myself for S’s speech problems.
Having looked further into it (and wondering why on earth they exist then?!), it is recommended that sippy cups are only used for
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approximately one month as a transition from bottle. Whoops! I was keen to avoid spills for much longer than that!
And although my head tells me that not all kids that have used sippy cups have speech problems, my heart would choose a thousand spills over S’s speech problems given the chance.
And this is only one aspect of my Mum guilt. Other questions I find I ask myself in moments of doubt include:
Was I so in tune with her before she could speak that she didn’t actually need to communicate anything? Sensible Mum answer: Don’t berate
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yourself for knowing your child well. Mum guilt answer: Yes, it’s all your fault.
Do I do her speech therapy homework with her often enough? Sensible Mum answer: Yes, she needs a break from it sometimes. Mum guilt answer: No, it’s all your fault.
Should I stop translating for her in conversations where I’m present? Sensible Mum answer: No, why would you make her feel uncomfortable? Mum guilt answer: Yes, it’s all your fault.
I’m happy to say though, there’s one thing relating to S’s speech that I don’t feel bad about, which is
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screen time.
Research has shown that children who use handheld screens before they begin to talk may be at higher risk for speech delays. I’m quite confident this doesn’t apply to S. I’m not saying she was perfectly sheilded from this new norm in a modern child’s life, but it just wasn’t something that held her interest until she was much older – I know because I often tried so I could get things done!
But on this subject, Mum guilt is replaced by Mum shame, as I convince myself that others must think S has often been babysat by the TV
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rather than lovingly read to everyday from being a newborn.
I might just get a t-shirt made… but should it say ‘it’s all my fault’ or ‘we’re doing our best’?!
More on www.inlingoblog.wordpress.com
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Muminlingo - 2 Oct 17
Today I was browsing sippy cups as I prepare to wean my youngest girl, and found myself paying over the odds for some kinda magic, no spill, beaker, rather than anything with a spout.
Why? Mum guilt had reared its ugly head. I’ve once read that use of sippy cups means tongue/teeth misplacement and can lead to imprecise articulation. Once was enough for me to instantly blame myself for S’s speech problems.
Having looked further into it (and wondering why on earth they exist then?!), it is recommended that sippy cups are only used for approximately one month as a transition from bottle. Whoops! I was keen to avoid spills for much longer than that!
And although my head tells me that not all kids that have used sippy cups have speech problems, my heart would choose a thousand spills over S’s speech problems given the chance.
And this is only one aspect of my Mum guilt. Other questions I find I ask myself in moments of doubt include:
Was I so in tune with her before she could speak that she didn’t actually need to communicate anything? Sensible Mum answer: Don’t berate yourself for knowing your child well. Mum guilt answer: Yes, it’s all your fault.
Do I do her speech therapy homework with her often enough? Sensible Mum answer: Yes, she needs a break from it sometimes. Mum guilt answer: No, it’s all your fault.
Should I stop translating for her in conversations where I’m present? Sensible Mum answer: No, why would you make her feel uncomfortable? Mum guilt answer: Yes, it’s all your fault.
I’m happy to say though, there’s one thing relating to S’s speech that I don’t feel bad about, which is screen time.
Research has shown that children who use handheld screens before they begin to talk may be at higher risk for speech delays. I’m quite confident this doesn’t apply to S. I’m not saying she was perfectly sheilded from this new norm in a modern child’s life, but it just wasn’t something that held her interest until she was much older – I know because I often tried so I could get things done!
But on this subject, Mum guilt is replaced by Mum shame, as I convince myself that others must think S has often been babysat by the TV rather than lovingly read to everyday from being a newborn.
I might just get a t-shirt made… but should it say ‘it’s all my fault’ or ‘we’re doing our best’?!
More on www.inlingoblog.wordpress.com
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Lucky mum of 2 girls, living in Teesside, inspired to blog about my eldest's speech difficulties and the highs and lows they bring to our busy family life.
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