Old school, new rules

Anita Ellis - 21 Aug 16

My little girl starts school this September and I’m dreading it. But not for the reasons you’d expect. Of course, I feel a pang of sadness at the thought of her all grown up in her school uniform and I’m going to miss our Mummy-Amèlie days (as she calls them) terribly. And inevitably I worry about her being so diddy (she’s only just turned 4) especially as even the smallest size uniform is too big. But deep down I know she’s ready and actually really excited about being grown up enough to be starting school.

No, what I’m dreading most about this new phase of our lives is becoming a school-gate Mum. It’s like starting school all over again or starting a new job.  I feel apprehensive, nervous, even a little sick. Will I make friends with the other Mums? Will the parents of her class mates be likeminded? Will they like me!?

Admittedly, I also feel a sense of ‘déjà vu’ since my daughter is going to the same primary school that I went to so it really is like being back in the school playground.

At the induction, she was a little overwhelmed but mainly excited, curiously asking lots of questions about everything and everyone.  I, on the other hand was scanning the strangely familiar room anxiously trying to find a friendly face, hoping that someone might catch my eye and smile, maybe come over and talk to me. Ask me to be their friend.  And I’m supposed to be the grownup.

Then there’s the admin. I’m pretty sure that when I was at primary school, all my parents had to contend with was the odd scrappy bit of paper festering in the bottom of my school bag. Now, there are countless forms and questionnaires to fill in, acceptance for this, approval for that, communications about events, even communications about communicating. And it doesn’t stop there. What with emails, text messages and social media groups; it’s going to be like having another job. I’m not even sure I’m on top of the one I get paid for!

And what about prospective afterschool play dates. The ‘Mummy, please can so-and-so come for tea today?’ The thought of these innocent little requests in the playground  fills me with even more dread. ‘Do I know this child?’ Do I know his/her parents? What can I give them for tea? Do I have ‘cool’ food/treats in? (as I’m typing this I’m not even sure I know what ‘cool’ food is but I’m sure whatever it is, I haven’t got it!).

You see, up until now we’ve been in that bubble where my husband and I are our daughter’s world. And that’s about to change. Inspirational teachers, conspirational friendships, emotional development; starting school is the beginning of a new adventure for both of us and it’s happening whether I like it or not.

Phew! Think it’s time for a glass of wine. Well, there’s got to be some benefits to being the grownup. Maybe I can bond with the school-gate Mums over a glass or two…

Anita Ellis

Mum to beautiful baby boy and gorgeous 4 year old girl. Wannabe writer, baking enthusiast and lover of all things French.

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