Remembering Lottie

MelbourneStreetsMummy - 18 Jul 16

Nearly three weeks after the birth of my beautiful Ollie, it is hard not to remember his little friend Lottie that was due to arrive only days from now.

Nine months ago, I was lying in bed scrolling Facebook when a message from my friend Sarah jumped up at me. It was a photo of a positive pregnancy test. I gave a little squeal and laughed out loud. I also had a secret… I was pregnant too!

I was keeping it a secret to surprise everyone at my son’s first birthday, but I couldn’t possibly keep it from her now.

We texted back and forth for over an hour joking about the birth, what sex we wanted and what life with more kids would be like. She had two girls and was hoping for a boy, I had a boy already, and was hanging for a girl.

At her 18-week ultrasound, Sarah finally found out she was expecting another little girl. Sarah was shocked but elated. She had been so sure she was having a boy. Her two daughters were also over the moon and they went full steam ahead, getting the nursery ready and even naming their soon to be new daughter and sister – Lottie.

Sarah made everything about her pregnancy so special and beautiful. This included a photoshoot with her daughters holding pink and blue balloons to announce the pregnancy on social media. Later, we also watched a video of them excitedly tearing open a box where pink balloons came tumbling out, revealing that they were expecting a girl.

During this time Sarah’s partner also proposed to her and we celebrated their engagement, both of us pregnant at their party. It truly was a really happy and exciting time for Sarah and her family.

Sarah being two weeks behind me was already winning in the baby belly stakes. She had a beautiful little baby bump and was the definition of ‘glowing’ on the night of her engagement party.

Only a few short weeks from that beautiful night where Sarah and Lee celebrated their engagement and the joy of their baby news, they lost their precious Lottie.

I was sitting at home with my son Eli when I received a text message from Sarah that left me feeling like I had been punched in the stomach. She said she was in hospital and had terrible news. Her little girl had passed away. Being 27 weeks pregnant myself, this hit home. I was in utter disbelief, how could she have passed away? She was nearly in third trimester, like me. She was supposed to be in the safe zone. I didn’t know what to say. You can’t say are you okay? Of course, she isn’t.

I let her know how sorry I was and was about to ask when she would be home when it suddenly dawned on me. Being that far along, she was going to have to go through a labour. I held Eli very tightly that day and could not stop crying thinking of what Sarah was going through. It just wasn’t fair.

I kept in contact with Sarah via texts throughout the labour hoping it would go quickly for her, but it didn’t. It was long and slow.

When Lottie was born, Sarah, her fiancé Lee and two daughters got to spend some special time together. Her other daughters didn’t understand. They kept asking Sarah when she was going to wake up. They just thought she was sleeping.

How do you explain this to a five and a three year old? The little girls who were so excited about being big sisters, who had grabbed me by the hand and proudly showed me Lottie’s room when I visited only a week before.

Sarah had to leave the hospital two days later, with empty arms and a broken heart. She told me going home without her baby girl was just unbearable. Leaving the hospital after the birth of your child is usually such a joyous occasion but instead Sarah left laden with pamphlets for planning her little girl’s funeral.

Lottie’s funeral was beautiful. By the end of it, we all knew Lottie. We knew her through the recollections of her parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, who all spoke of their love for her and the significance of the short time they spent with her.

Their love for Lottie was evident through every single special touch. From the beautiful flowers and the well thought out words from loved ones. To the pink ribbons we all pinned to our clothing to remember her and to the closing where everyone formed a circle and wrapped their arms around each in memory of Lottie.

Sarah being the amazing mother she is, made sure her beautiful little girl is resting in peace.

During her time at the hospital Sarah came across some amazing support and organisations. One of them being Heartfelt – a charity that sends professional volunteer photographers into hospitals to capture these precious moments of babies and their bereaved parents. These photos have captured memories that Sarah and Lee will cherish forever.

Another charity was Angel Gowns who lovingly hand craft garments from donated wedding dresses for families such as Sarah’s, who find themselves facing the unimaginable stillbirth or death of their baby. Angel Gowns provided Lottie with two of the most delicate and ornate baby pink handcrafted dresses which from the photos I’ve seen, Lottie looked so precious in.

Over the past few months Sarah and fiancée Lee have showed amazing strength and  in memory of Lottie,  have just launched their online children’s clothing store Boho Child where a dollar from every order goes to SIDS and KIDS.

SIDS and Kids is dedicated to saving the lives of babies and children during pregnancy, birth, infancy and childhood and supporting bereaved families.

In memory of Lottie please like Boho Child’s Facebook page to help Sarah and Lee raise money to fund more research into the prevention of SIDS.

MelbourneStreetsMummy

Hi, My name is Katie, and I am the Melbourne-based mother behind Melbourne Streets With Little Feet. Melbourne Streets with Little Feet celebrates our family's inner-city lifestyle, provides advice on kid-friendly places, tips for getting out and about with little ones and follows my journey as a mother. Join me as I attempt to juggle my inner city lifestyle with my new and exciting role as a mother. Enjoy, KA

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