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View as: GRID LIST

SECOND HAND SHIT FOR CHRISTMAS

1
 
I know some people turn up their noses at second hand toys but not in this house. In this house we love second hand shit! Ebay, jumble sales, Gumtree – you name it we’ve been there routing through the junk. I’ve picked up some brilliant bargains over the years! And so it comes as no surprise that Finley will be getting some second hand toys this Christmas, just like he did last year.

”But not for his Christmas present, surely?”

Oh yes people.

”Don’t you want to buy him nice new presents?” 
No, actually. Our agenda is to buy

SelfishMother.com
2
him what he likes and as much of it as the budget will allow.

Last year, when he was just over a year old we opted for a kitchen for Christmas. The concept of buying a new one never crossed my mind. I did my research, put the feelers out and in the end I made an awesome purchase via EBay. This kitchen ladies and gentlemen, with all its plastic paraphernalia cost me a forty minute car journey and thirty little pounds. Yes, it’s probably ten years old and it’s not a fashionable wooden one but by gum it’s a kids kitchen to be smashed and crashed and

SelfishMother.com
3
played with for years to come!

Of course I could of bought a brand new one, but then there wouldn’t have been anything else, no other presents. Last year, he had his kitchen, his stocking and a whole host of other little presents, all because his ’big’ present was second hand and cheap as chips.

This year if you’ve been selling Happy Land in a town near me if I haven’t won it, haggled it or quite frankly guilt tripped it out of you I’d be surprised! I’m not beyond dive bombing old ladies at Jumble Sales. Not for the holy grail

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that is second hand Happy Land.

”But you can buy shiny new Happy Land from ELC, there’s an offer on you know.”
Of course there’s an offer on, it’s Christmas.
Allow me to demonstrate the magical powers of second hand shit …

Here is £65 worth of brand new, shop bought Happy Land. Its on special offer! Included in the price is a load of cardboard packaging you’ll be fighting with on Boxing Day to get in your wheelie bin. Plus you get the treat of unscrewing it all out whilst your kid shouts at you from across the room, to hurry

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up.

Nice and shiny huh?
Next up is £65 worth of second hand, Mummy special tits Happy Land.
I shit you not. I obtained the entire Land of Happy for £55 plus two car journeys that cost me £10 in petrol. There are also metres and metres of train track and road which you can’t see in this photo, not to mention the storage box and other play mats.

”But it’s not new and other children have played with it, what if it’s dirty?”
Well first off, it wasn’t dirty because I bought it off nice normal, clean human beings but I did of

SelfishMother.com
6
course give it all a quick anti-bac rub down. Second of all, my kid licks windows and eats carpet food – a little bit of second hand snot or dribble wont trouble his rather robust immune system.

”Second hand toys are often broken or don’t work.”
Well yes, if you’re stupid enough to buy those ones.

There are only two things ’broken’ in my Happy Land haul, both of which the sellers declared to me before purchase and I took on the chin because of the bargain price. One of the doors to the church has fallen off and there are a couple of felt tip

SelfishMother.com
7
pen marks inside the school.
Finley won’t have a clue. He’ll be too busy having his little mind blown by all this amazing shit greeting him on Christmas morning! Plus he’ll also have his stocking and a few other little presents because the budget wasn’t blown.

Of course this golden gig of second hand shopping won’t last forever. It won’t be long till he wants ’THE’ toy, the brand new, shiny toy that all the kids wants for Christmas and we won’t be able to eBay ourselves out of that one!
But until then, for a few years at least this family

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will be enjoying a lot of second hand shit for Christmas.
SelfishMother.com

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- 24 Nov 15

 

I know some people turn up their noses at second hand toys but not in this house. In this house we love second hand shit! Ebay, jumble sales, Gumtree – you name it we’ve been there routing through the junk. I’ve picked up some brilliant bargains over the years! And so it comes as no surprise that Finley will be getting some second hand toys this Christmas, just like he did last year.

“But not for his Christmas present, surely?”

Oh yes people.

“Don’t you want to buy him nice new presents?” 
No, actually. Our agenda is to buy him what he likes and as much of it as the budget will allow.


Last year, when he was just over a year old we opted for a kitchen for Christmas. The concept of buying a new one never crossed my mind. I did my research, put the feelers out and in the end I made an awesome purchase via EBay. This kitchen ladies and gentlemen, with all its plastic paraphernalia cost me a forty minute car journey and thirty little pounds. Yes, it’s probably ten years old and it’s not a fashionable wooden one but by gum it’s a kids kitchen to be smashed and crashed and played with for years to come!

Of course I could of bought a brand new one, but then there wouldn’t have been anything else, no other presents. Last year, he had his kitchen, his stocking and a whole host of other little presents, all because his ‘big’ present was second hand and cheap as chips.

This year if you’ve been selling Happy Land in a town near me if I haven’t won it, haggled it or quite frankly guilt tripped it out of you I’d be surprised! I’m not beyond dive bombing old ladies at Jumble Sales. Not for the holy grail that is second hand Happy Land.

“But you can buy shiny new Happy Land from ELC, there’s an offer on you know.”
Of course there’s an offer on, it’s Christmas.

Allow me to demonstrate the magical powers of second hand shit …

Here is £65 worth of brand new, shop bought Happy Land. Its on special offer! Included in the price is a load of cardboard packaging you’ll be fighting with on Boxing Day to get in your wheelie bin. Plus you get the treat of unscrewing it all out whilst your kid shouts at you from across the room, to hurry up.


Nice and shiny huh?

Next up is £65 worth of second hand, Mummy special tits Happy Land.
I shit you not. I obtained the entire Land of Happy for £55 plus two car journeys that cost me £10 in petrol. There are also metres and metres of train track and road which you can’t see in this photo, not to mention the storage box and other play mats.
“But it’s not new and other children have played with it, what if it’s dirty?”
Well first off, it wasn’t dirty because I bought it off nice normal, clean human beings but I did of course give it all a quick anti-bac rub down. Second of all, my kid licks windows and eats carpet food – a little bit of second hand snot or dribble wont trouble his rather robust immune system.
“Second hand toys are often broken or don’t work.”
Well yes, if you’re stupid enough to buy those ones.
There are only two things ‘broken’ in my Happy Land haul, both of which the sellers declared to me before purchase and I took on the chin because of the bargain price. One of the doors to the church has fallen off and there are a couple of felt tip pen marks inside the school.

Finley won’t have a clue. He’ll be too busy having his little mind blown by all this amazing shit greeting him on Christmas morning! Plus he’ll also have his stocking and a few other little presents because the budget wasn’t blown.

Of course this golden gig of second hand shopping won’t last forever. It won’t be long till he wants ‘THE’ toy, the brand new, shiny toy that all the kids wants for Christmas and we won’t be able to eBay ourselves out of that one!
But until then, for a few years at least this family will be enjoying a lot of second hand shit for Christmas.

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MUM, WIFE, WORKER, CAT LOVER. TRUTH IS I'M A SOCIALLY AWKWARD WINE DRINKER WHO WATCHES TOO MUCH GREY'S ANATOMY AND EATS FAR TOO MUCH CAKE.

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