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Sprinkles on Toast and Unanswered Questions

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Neither my other half or I are particularly well endowed in the parent department…me an adult orphan, I know that’s not a thing but I still don’t feel ‘old’ enough to have lost both parents and my other half lost his dad when he was just fourteen.  Mum died three years before I had my first child and dad, seven years prior to that.

It’s strange as I don’t really miss them as parents, as I’ve been quite independent from a young age as they were both ill for a long time, but I miss them as the grandparents they could have been.

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There’s the obvious things like not having a great babysitting service on tap, but my biggest thing is that my mum never got to see me have children. My kids never got to call her Nanny or have sleep overs or be spoilt rotten by her.

As I write this I realise it’s more than that. There’s no one to ask questions too.  What was I like as a baby, how was her labour, did I sleep well?  Was I breast fed? Did Dad change nappies? Why am I so scared of wasps? All the things I wouldn’t have paid much attention to before having kids of my own, now

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seem to be gaping holes in my make-up and what makes me, ‘me’.

My boys do have a wonderful grandma in my other half’s mum, but it kills me when he says things like ‘Dad would have been such a fun granddad’ or ‘he would have loved being a grandpa’. Ok, she may offer them sprinkles on toast for breakfast, but they love her with a brilliant, fun and comforting love, only grandparents can induce from small people.

There’s isn’t really a conclusion or much of a point to my ramblings, but just to say grill your parents now about what

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you were like as a kid, cherish the times your babies spend with them and never ever take their special grandparent love for granted.

Faye x

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- 7 Jun 16

Neither my other half or I are particularly well endowed in the parent department…me an adult orphan, I know that’s not a thing but I still don’t feel ‘old’ enough to have lost both parents and my other half lost his dad when he was just fourteen.  Mum died three years before I had my first child and dad, seven years prior to that.

It’s strange as I don’t really miss them as parents, as I’ve been quite independent from a young age as they were both ill for a long time, but I miss them as the grandparents they could have been. There’s the obvious things like not having a great babysitting service on tap, but my biggest thing is that my mum never got to see me have children. My kids never got to call her Nanny or have sleep overs or be spoilt rotten by her.

As I write this I realise it’s more than that. There’s no one to ask questions too.  What was I like as a baby, how was her labour, did I sleep well?  Was I breast fed? Did Dad change nappies? Why am I so scared of wasps? All the things I wouldn’t have paid much attention to before having kids of my own, now seem to be gaping holes in my make-up and what makes me, ‘me’.

My boys do have a wonderful grandma in my other half’s mum, but it kills me when he says things like ‘Dad would have been such a fun granddad’ or ‘he would have loved being a grandpa’. Ok, she may offer them sprinkles on toast for breakfast, but they love her with a brilliant, fun and comforting love, only grandparents can induce from small people.

There’s isn’t really a conclusion or much of a point to my ramblings, but just to say grill your parents now about what you were like as a kid, cherish the times your babies spend with them and never ever take their special grandparent love for granted.

Faye x

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Faye Spiller - mum to two boys, Herbie aged 7 and Rudy aged 17 months. Lives in Shoreham by Sea, West Sussex. Self employed social media and web content bod. Loves sunsets, seaside, books, coffee, cake and my campervan.

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