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View as: GRID LIST

The 6 Archetypes of Sleep

1
Not all sleep struggles are created equal…

What seems an absolute disaster to one family, is perfectly manageable to the next. What sends one mama spiraling into the pits of sleep-deprived despair, bounces off the next like water off a duck’s back.

Why?

I bring you the 6 archetypes of sleep.
1. The Sleep Victim
Wondering why on earth this is happening to her, she takes all sleep struggles personally. What on earth has she done to deserve this!?

She takes no responsibility for her own life, decisions, day to day functioning, instead

SelfishMother.com
2
blaming everything going wrong in her life on sleep…none of it’s within her control, it’s all sleep’s fault.

She says stuff like ‘I have to…’, ‘I can’t…’, ‘I’m the only one…’ and is constantly paranoid about rods for backs &  bad habits.

This mama hates her sleep situation, she’d love to experience more joy in motherhood, but is too stuck in victim mode to take any effective action.
2. The Sleep Slave
Sleep dominates her life. Every day, every move, every decision is made with sleep in mind.  She lives in

SelfishMother.com
3
permanent fear of sleep going wrong.

Outings are planned to the nth degree, lavender drops measured with military precision, naps and wake ups timed and logged without fail.

She is obsessed. If anything threatens her carefully laid out plans she’ll lose it big time.

Pressure is higheeee and even the slightest sleep slip-up has her questioning all those plans, going back to google, wondering where she went wrong.
3. The Sleep Martyr
This mama has surrendered to her struggles and given up hope that life will ever get any better. She does

SelfishMother.com
4
whatever she needs to, to get her little one to sleep and ignores her own needs in the process.

She lies for hours at night needing the toilet but not going in case it wakes the baby.
She cancels plans with friends in case little one won’t nap on the way.
She never asks for help and says she’s fine if anyone offers.

She ploughs on doing all the things for everyone else all the time whether they really ‘need’ doing or not. Whether she’s totally exhausted or not.

She does nothing for herself. Nothing for her own happiness…she’s not

SelfishMother.com
5
sure what exactly does make her happy anymore…
4. The Sleep Maverick
The sleep maverick doesn’t care what you think. Or for ‘rules’, shoulds, rods and habits.

When sleep goes squiffy she rides it out, daring anyone to question or judge her in the process.

She doesn’t have any particular strategy or routine but goes with the flow. She doesn’t care if he naps 3 times one day and not at all the next. Or if bedtime wasn’t until 10pm…so what?

She gets on with life, sleep or no sleep.
5. The Sleep Sage
The sleep sage cares not for

SelfishMother.com
6
google, or self-professed baby sleep gurus, preferring instead to equip herself with evidence based knowledge and information to make her own informed choices.

When sleep wibbles she doesn’t get sucked into worried panic, but remains calm and level-headed, gets curious about what’s happening for her little right now.

She’s still all about the sleep, but stays present, mindful & informed, reacting from a place of love, not fear.
6. The Sleep Sovereign
This is motherhood, her way.

She has all the sleep science nailed and practises her

SelfishMother.com
7
mindset tools daily, dancing light-footed through sleep changes whenever they happen.

All her choices and decisions are informed and right for her & her family. She owns them.  She doesn’t question herself or falter under the pressure of ‘shoulds’.  Just smiles, nods, and moves on.

This mama is in control…of herself, her life & her reactions.  Life is happening FOR her not to her.

She makes time for herself, meeting her own needs is an absolute priority, irrespective of sleep.

She knows how to ask for help. And does so

SelfishMother.com
8
often.

She is a rock. A mountain. Unswayed by sleep shiz, unwanted opinions, well meaning advice.

She is confident, compassionate and connected…to herself and to her family.

 

This is what motherhood can be like.

I can help you get there, find out how here.

SelfishMother.com
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- 25 Oct 19

Not all sleep struggles are created equal…

What seems an absolute disaster to one family, is perfectly manageable to the next. What sends one mama spiraling into the pits of sleep-deprived despair, bounces off the next like water off a duck’s back.

Why?

I bring you the 6 archetypes of sleep.

1. The Sleep Victim

Wondering why on earth this is happening to her, she takes all sleep struggles personally. What on earth has she done to deserve this!?

She takes no responsibility for her own life, decisions, day to day functioning, instead blaming everything going wrong in her life on sleep…none of it’s within her control, it’s all sleep’s fault.

She says stuff like ‘I have to…’, ‘I can’t…’, ‘I’m the only one…’ and is constantly paranoid about rods for backs &  bad habits.

This mama hates her sleep situation, she’d love to experience more joy in motherhood, but is too stuck in victim mode to take any effective action.

2. The Sleep Slave

Sleep dominates her life. Every day, every move, every decision is made with sleep in mind.  She lives in permanent fear of sleep going wrong.

Outings are planned to the nth degree, lavender drops measured with military precision, naps and wake ups timed and logged without fail.

She is obsessed. If anything threatens her carefully laid out plans she’ll lose it big time.

Pressure is higheeee and even the slightest sleep slip-up has her questioning all those plans, going back to google, wondering where she went wrong.

3. The Sleep Martyr

This mama has surrendered to her struggles and given up hope that life will ever get any better. She does whatever she needs to, to get her little one to sleep and ignores her own needs in the process.

She lies for hours at night needing the toilet but not going in case it wakes the baby.
She cancels plans with friends in case little one won’t nap on the way.
She never asks for help and says she’s fine if anyone offers.

She ploughs on doing all the things for everyone else all the time whether they really ‘need’ doing or not. Whether she’s totally exhausted or not.

She does nothing for herself. Nothing for her own happiness…she’s not sure what exactly does make her happy anymore…

4. The Sleep Maverick

The sleep maverick doesn’t care what you think. Or for ‘rules’, shoulds, rods and habits.

When sleep goes squiffy she rides it out, daring anyone to question or judge her in the process.

She doesn’t have any particular strategy or routine but goes with the flow. She doesn’t care if he naps 3 times one day and not at all the next. Or if bedtime wasn’t until 10pm…so what?

She gets on with life, sleep or no sleep.

5. The Sleep Sage

The sleep sage cares not for google, or self-professed baby sleep gurus, preferring instead to equip herself with evidence based knowledge and information to make her own informed choices.

When sleep wibbles she doesn’t get sucked into worried panic, but remains calm and level-headed, gets curious about what’s happening for her little right now.

She’s still all about the sleep, but stays present, mindful & informed, reacting from a place of love, not fear.

6. The Sleep Sovereign

This is motherhood, her way.

She has all the sleep science nailed and practises her mindset tools daily, dancing light-footed through sleep changes whenever they happen.

All her choices and decisions are informed and right for her & her family. She owns them.  She doesn’t question herself or falter under the pressure of ‘shoulds’.  Just smiles, nods, and moves on.

This mama is in control…of herself, her life & her reactions.  Life is happening FOR her not to her.

She makes time for herself, meeting her own needs is an absolute priority, irrespective of sleep.

She knows how to ask for help. And does so often.

She is a rock. A mountain. Unswayed by sleep shiz, unwanted opinions, well meaning advice.

She is confident, compassionate and connected…to herself and to her family.

 

This is what motherhood can be like.

I can help you get there, find out how here.

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Emma is owner & founder of Courage & Chamomile where she helps new mums navigate the crazy whirlwind of motherhood. She’s an international family sleep and wellbeing specialist, mama mentor, coach, early years teacher, positive psychology geek, mummy, daughter, wife, sister, friend and lover of squirrels. She is passionate about respecting and treating little people as...well, people, and helping confused, frustrated and downright exhausted parents understand their little people so they can all get some more rest...WITHOUT sleep training. She hates sleep training! Emma is hosting a 10 week live online group coaching program to empower mamas to navigate sleep struggles more mindfully, starting November 18th.

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