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Up Pompeii – The Sex Edit
When I studied journalism, we were asked what the single biggest thing was that sold newspapers. What were the stories that made the papers fly off the shelves? We all suggested various subjects; the Royal Family, notorious murders, infamous celebrities, political mudslinging etc. However, we were all delighted when our lecturer shook his head and wrote on the white board in big
Sex sells. Sex has always sold. It’s not called the oldest profession for nothing. The dusty and intriguing streets of Pompeii reveal brothels and rather inappropriate murals, or appropriate if you like that sort of thing.
In the UK we have long waged a war on red-tops and Miss World competitions for demeaning women. But there is a demand for it as long as time. We are, human. To desire is a fundamental part of our human condition.
Why shouldn’t Sam Fox have got her tits out willy nilly in the 80s, as long as it
Back in the 90s my nickname was perfect tits. Just saying.
Strip clubs provide a necessary function in our society. Not in the Animal House film type way with university students getting laid, but in the ignition of passion back in the home fires. Keeping the human race ticking along nicely. Got to keep procreating.
It is of course true that we all love a bit of salacious gossip, whether it’s at an office party where two colleagues warmed
I think scandal makes us feel a bit better about our own lives. It puts it into perspective and we don’t feel so bad about lying to the doctor about our weekly amount of alcohol units. It is our everyday confessional. A readjustment of our morals. Most of The Rolling Stones should be dead by now, and the fact they’re not, means it’s okay to go on an almighty booze-up that takes us a
The more famous the person who has digressed the better. The media storm that whipped up last year over the embargoed multi billionaire who had been caught short in a paddling pool with some olive oil was at fever pitch. The speculation, the shock, and then the absurdity of it being common knowledge everywhere except England. However, who are we to say, or judge, that what two or three consenting adults got up to, was in actual fact a digression? Yes, the story was protected so that their children could be. That is a
However, it’s a bit rich of us to sit in ivory towers judging others. It was simply three humans having sex.
I wonder if in Roman Pompeii with togas flapping and in the dry heat of the day, morals were not so fiercely chastised. Carved phallus’s were commonplace around the home, they denoted luck in erectile function. Which isn’t to
And what of the actual business of having sex? I was once gobsmacked to hear the number of times my married friends had sex during the week. Most were once, that seemed to be average, manageable even. But one friend said he had sex six times a week. We all stared open-mouthed and very enviously at his good fortune in this department. Turned out not long after, that his wife left him. But that’s probably just bad luck, not libido.
Libido is a strange fruit. It needs a matching libido to really create harmony I think. If one partner
I think there’s nothing nicer than bookending the day with some good bedroom action. Start the day with a bang and then wind down with some nice lovemaking and fall asleep. That’s my ideal matching libido. However, if there was a bit of how’s your father in between times too then that would be a Brucie Bonus. If you like sex,
When I started on this path, belatedly in my very late teens. I was rather disappointed with what befell me. I had held out for someone special, and really did wonder why I bothered. Not only was he a disappointment, but the sex was too. I couldn’t believe that was really what all the fuss was about.
It was like trying lager for the first time and coughing because it tasted so bitter and foul. How could anyone drink this stuff? However, like a good single malt, it takes time to be accustomed to the taste,
As I say, I was late to this particular party. And even then, once I’d put my coat on the big pile of coats and grabbed a lukewarm lager, I was still no wiser about this whole orgasm thing.
Until that is, my male friend and I were reading an article in Cosmopolitan magazine about this very subject, and how to achieve same. It was a revelation. We set to work to try it out immediately, and that, dear reader, was a game changer.
They don’t teach you about
The next hurdle was how to combine this new-found art with actual sex. This proved to be difficult. Consultation with peers seemed to suggest that anything other than a clitoral orgasm was a myth and so it was best to avoid getting your hopes up about that one. However, many friends did seem to be drinking deeply from this well, and it’s existence seemed very much real.
These days a quick search on You Tube will bring up some actually useful and sassy videos on just these subjects. How to give the perfect blow job, how to find
With an Ann Summers store on most high streets, it seems that sex has an established place in our lives as something fun. The Pill saw to that for us. Women and men can have sex, in whatever configuration, for purely pleasurable purposes. Not so much Catholic shame.
I read a blog about what
I do think sex is very important in a relationship. And I think if you enjoy it you’ll always seek out opportunities to have it. New ways, risqué ways. But what’s important is to keep it going. Never. Stop. Except maybe if you are in traction with a hip
I hope, dear reader your sex lives are wondrous and stimulating. If feeling a little lacklustre in this department, spice things up with a blindfold and some ice cubes. Maybe listening to the strains of Sam Fox’s Touch Me, only kidding about that last bit! Better off with some Julio or Enrique Iglesias. Get some Latin moves going then the rest will follow.
Yours, Carolina
