We’re all going on a summer holiday

Sarah Brisdion - 3 Jun 16

So you’ve flicked through brochures, holiday websites, almost broken Trip Advisor you’ve been on it so much and then you book the one (probably extortionately priced due to school holidays) trip of your year. You then throw yourself into summer clothes shopping, with all abandon, blissfully imagining sandy beaches, cocktails and perfectly behaved children that stay up late without whinging and lie in until 10.30am. Haha! Well, we all know that isn’t going to happen! But if you’re lucky, you will get some sand, sangria* (*insert alcoholic beverage of choice), ice cream and fun and laughter for a week or two, leaving you with a hint of feeling relaxed and having enjoyed some quality family time. Even if you do need another holiday to get over it when you get back.

That’s the dream I have too. But it’s more complicated than planning a holiday around our couple of five year olds. Yes we need entertainment (mainly an endless supply of beaches and ice cream) and suitable places to take a couple of reasonably picky eaters. We need a hotel or villa that is as child friendly as possible. But when you are a parent of a child with a disability, there is so much more you have to think about. More than I could have imagined was necessary.

We have accessibility at home pretty much nailed.  We have the kit to cope and are used to our surroundings, so manage to navigate our way through life fairly seamlessly. But when we go away it’s hard, as we can’t take all the mobility equipment we need with us on a plane (not easily anyway). So we opt to travel by car and ferry if we want to leave the country. That’s a whole host of countries out of the picture already. We have to do our research and see how wheelchair friendly the destination is and if we are going to have to rule out most of the tourist attractions because of too many steps and other obstacles (this happens a lot).

But the most depressing thing is we have to think long and hard about what the toilets will be like where we are going. Now we all know that toilets on holiday are not why we go (excuse the pun). They are usually pretty naff when out and about. But we deal with it. It’s part and parcel of the holiday experience, peeing in a hole in the floor (trying desperately to miss your shoes) or trying to squeeze into something that resembles the size of a coffin to answer a call of nature. And not being able to flush the loo roll!! I hate that bit. We don’t realise how lucky we are with our sewerage system in the UK.

But when you have a child who is incontinent due to his disability, you need more than a suitcase full of nappies and wipes. You have to face the fact that those toilet floors will have to accommodate this beautiful person that you love, to enable you to change those nappies.

We like every family, seek a bit of respite from work, washing and everything else that life throws at us as parents. But sometimes being away from home, without its comforts, puts a lot of strain and extra stress on us, rather than relieving some of it.

We did go away this year. And we opted (like last year) to go to Jersey (Channel Islands). Not because the island has any Changing Places or Space to Change facilities with adult-sized benches or hoists (that’s something I will work on), but because it is so clean and easy to get to for us. It felt less scary than trying to cope in mainland Europe. Plus I have yet to learn how to explain our needs in French, Spanish or Italian….etc!

Yes, we did have to use several toilet floors to change our little man whilst away. And we had to squeeze into some ridiculously small places with a wheelchair to undertake said deed. But we needed the time away, so we managed. I think the sand and ice cream meant that he didn’t mind too much. Besides the fact that the poor love is used to it. Bless him. He worries more about me lifting him than himself. We rented a pretty accessible villa that was close to the beaches and some of the main attractions, so we could nip back to it if his need for changing wasn’t too urgent, which really helped.

It makes me a bit sad though. That the first thing we have to ask ourselves is: “are we likely to catch something hideous from a toilet floor whilst on holiday?” And not simply: “where do we want to go?”

I’d love to hear from you about places you have been that have been able to accommodate your additional needs. We have not ventured any further than the Channel Islands, but would love for the kids to get to see a bit more of the world.

A friend of mine is desperately trying to get more Changing Places installed in Europe and I’m trying to help him, by writing to my MEP. If you think that Europe needs to become more accessible, including the introduction of Changing Places facilities on the continent, then please do let your MEP know. You can write to them here.

We’ve done all the hard work for you by writing the letter, you just have to personalise it. If you have a spare few mins (I’m laughing at that very likelihood!), but if you do, you could help us make a real difference to those who need a little extra help when away from home.

Happy holidays xx

Sarah Brisdion

My name is Sarah, I'm 37 years old. Mum to six year old twins, one who has special needs (Cerebral Palsy). As well as a mother, I'm a copywriter and campaigner for disabled rights. I love a good chat, a good bottle of wine and a good chocolate cake! Oh and of course, a good SM tee! xx

View profile for posts, events and more info