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What the hell do you call a blog about being a mum?
I have to admit that I was somewhat cautious about starting to write this blog at all, and in the end I’ve done so with no other ambition for it other than to document how I’m feeling about the slightly mad world of being pregnant, and in the hope that if other like-minded mums do find it, I’ve helped them feel like they aren’t the only person feeling like a bit of a mad-woman at times!
I didn’t write during my first trimester, partly because we were only telling a select number of people, and in particular I didn’t want my clients to
Cue the 12 week mark, and the bit of advice that I’ve come to learn that parents live by ’everything changes’ definitely came true for me. The nausea disappeared, on the whole my energy came back, and I started to feel like myself again. A big part of this was finally being able to face food again, and return to my normal (mostly) clean-eating ways, something that had gone out of the window in the
As normal life ensued, so did my excitement about having this baby, and my curiosity about how I approach pregnancy and then motherhood was aroused. I’m going to be a mum at 38 (well, almost 39 by then); and whilst
(1) I’m probably more selfish about who I am and the life I’ve (we’ve) built up and want to preserve it
I don’t mean to mis-represent how I see motherhood here. I know our children will mean everything to us, and that I would lay my life down on the line for them if it was required. But, by 38, I’ve watched the majority of our friends go
(2) I tend to question the way that ’things are done’ in favour of assessing all the information and working it out for myself
This was a big part of the naming decision for this blog (no mean feat amongst the millions of mum blogs that now exist!). I’ve seen friends be vilified by other mums, or the health system when they haven’t successfully managed to breast feed, or because they’ve chosen a certain approach to getting their child to sleep. The common thread amongst all of the mums I’ve spoken
This is in no way saying that advice from others can’t be helpful – of course it can, and I’m the first to research and understand some of the given thinking before working out my own thoughts – standing on the shoulders of others if you will – but ultimately, you have to work out what’s right for you. Your child, your body, your partner, your family – your decision.
(3) I’m much more aware of what is good
I put our success in getting pregnant at all to the help we received from an amazing acupuncturist (Ross Barr, check him out, he’s a genius!) and nutritionist (Eve Kalinik, also brilliant). I was (I thought) a pretty healthy individual before I saw these guru’s – I exercised 5 or 6 times a week, ate a healthy diet, liked a few drinks at the weekend, but had definitely calmed down over the years, etc etc…. but
This experience has made me realise that there are numerous treatments that work hand in hand with western medicine (or sometimes, instead of) that not only make you feel more relaxed and in control, but directly affect positive outcomes in pregnancy.
(4) I’m at the point where I’m comfortable with my style, and love fashion, and don’t want this to be
I know a girl who writes a great blog called @DresslikeaMum – and it’s essentially a campaign bringing into question people’s perceptions that mums dress in a certain way, and essentially lose all of their style credibility the moment they procreate. I have to admit, I’m probably one of those people who held a perception that the moment you become a mum you don Ugg’s and a large puffa jacket, the rest of your wardrobe loses relevance, and I desperately wanted to run away from this outcome.
Of course this isn’t the
(5) Most importantly, I’ve learnt in all other areas of my life that what you plan may bear no
I can’t think of a scenario where this is more relevant than becoming a mother. All of the above means that I want to try to find a way that I think about it all, some kind of common thread that I can come back to, but at the end of the day this will be the ultimate exercise in loss of control. The little person who is about to arrive is just that, a person, meaning that they’ll have their own personality, will and way of doing things, and much as I’d love to plan it all, there is
So that’s it I guess. This blog is going to explore the answers to questions I have as I go along this path, with recommended reading (I’ve already found a few gems that have made me feel normal in how I think about things), sources for great clothes that see you through the 9 months and beyond, approaches to food and more. Even if no-one reads it, I’ll have enjoyed writing
Caroline x
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