WHY IT’S OK TO HAVE VICES

Molly Gunn - 15 Feb 16

It’s funny because it’s true, right? The above meme certainly resonates with me. I’m sure I’m not the only one to think of coffee and alcohol as my friends when doing the mother-work-life thing daily on repeat. They were my buddies pre-kids and frankly not much has changed.

But these aren’t my only vices: some Green & Blacks; a committed Instagram habit; a lengthy browse of Facebook; a mega-watch of Brooklyn 99 when there is other stuff to do. These things similarly release those endorphins. These are my partners-in-crime to relieve any pressure I’m feeling, and have some very small daily doses of ‘me’ time.

Granted, they are not bad off-the-richter-scale vices, but I’m sure you’ll understand when I say that going on Instagram can sometimes feel like a drug!

Also funnily enough, work feels like a vice. I love running Selfish Mother so much that I often find myself creeping off to answer emails surreptitiously when I’m meant to be doing childcare, or I’m at a friends house having a coffee. If an exciting work email pings in or we’ve had a great reaction to a new product, I feel like I just want to bury my head in it and work work work, because it’s so fun and exciting. I get a buzz from it.

But as a mum, it is easy to get vice guilt. To feel like I should be focusing on something else.

If I creep off when I am in sole charge of the kids or I open a bottle of wine on the dot of five, it’s easy to judge myself. It’s easy to think “I’m bad for doing this thing I want to do, I should be fully focused on Lego / Batman / whatever the kids want.”

But, I had a realisation the other day – because Not On the High Street asked me to write this here post about being a #MaverickMum (the new campaign they are running). And I thought about it and I decided that you can’t be a #MaverickMum in today’s world without vices.

Vices are good for us.

As long as vices are tempered with other wholesome stuff; outdoor time (for you & them), interacting time, quality chatting family time, meals together etc. Then we’re doing okay.

In fact vices are not only okay but… they are downright essential to our sanity and wellbeing.

Because being a #MaverickMum, which I think means spinning loads of plates in their air, with some them breaking… is slightly bonkers, in a good way. We don’t have to be saints the second we have children.

And as such I’ve decided to give myself a break.

My name’s Molly, I am a #MaverickMum and I have vices. So what? It’s pretty hard to be vice-free. If I don’t indulge the vices that make me happy, then I think I’d go bananas.
And, I kind of enjoy feeling like I’m NOT perfect.

After all a happy mother equals happy family.

Now, I’m off to watch some Brooklyn 99 with a glass of ‘something.’

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Take part in the #MaverickMum campaign:
1) Share your vices on social – use #MaverickMum hashtag to win NOTHS goodies.
2) Check out Not On the High Street’s Mother’s Day picks too.

Molly Gunn

Molly Gunn is the Curator of Goodness at Selfish Mother, a site she created for likeminded women in 2013. Molly has been a journalist for over 15 years, starting out on fashion desks at The Guardian, The Telegraph & ES Magazine before going freelance in 2006 to write for publications including Red, Stella, Grazia, Net-A-Porter and ELLE. She now edits Selfish Mother and creates #GoodTees which are sold via TheFMLYStore.com and John Lewis and have so far raised £650K for charity. Molly is mother to Rafferty, 5, Fox, 3 and baby Liberty. Molly is married to Tom, aka music producer Tee Mango and founder of Millionhands. They live, work and play in Somerset.

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