I was recently at a dinner with some of my very close friends.  We are all working mothers with similar aged children, and during this dinner (and after much prosecco!) the conversation turned to our roles within our families and the guilt that we all, irrationally, feel about taking time out for ourselves.

Now, all of us are married to wonderful men who are fantastic fathers and supportive partners who don’t make us feel bad about looking after ourselves.  One of my friends remarked that her husband had taken himself off for a haircut earlier that week without a second thought, whereas when she goes to get her hair cut she feels guilty about it and can’t relax during it as she’s constantly thinking that she needs to get back to the kids.   What was also interesting was how we all realised was how, despite being working women, we were all inadvertently taking on more than our fair share of the childcare and household duties because we feel that it what we should be doing.

I think as women we tend to gravitate towards these roles, but this can often be at the expense of our own physical and mental health.  In taking on more at work and at home we spread ourselves so thinly that we start to neglect our own needs in the pursuit of doing what we think will making others happy.  However, I am a firm believer in the mantra, “happy mum means happy baby”, and if we want to be the best mothers, partners and employees that we can then we have to look after ourselves too.

So, this is why I have decided to set up the #selfcareclub.  I will be posting self care tips on my blog, my Facebook and my Instagram accounts with the aim of help us to balance our lives and improve our health.  I’d really love it if you could join in and share your experiences and self care tips too.

I’m going to start by sharing self care tips aimed specifically at new mums.  Being a new mum is an incredibly overwhelming time.  It can be difficult to find the time to shower, let alone do anything else for yourself.  Moreover, it is a difficult time with sleep deprivation, altered body image, hormones and loss of identity and therefore it is an absolutely crucial time to look after yourself.  I have previously blogged about post natal depression; part of both the prevention and treatment of postnatal depression is self care.

However, my tips aren’t only going to be useful for new mums, I really hope that they will be useful to everyone!

The first tip is to say yes to every offer of help you get!  This could be as easy or mundane as someone offering to make you a cup of tea, but could be an offer to cook for you, clean a bit, or an offer to take the baby out for a bit.  The early days with a newborn are so difficult, but sometimes no matter how knackered you are it can be difficult to accept offers of help, not because we don’t need or want the help, but because we worry that in accepting the help we might make ourselves look vulnerable.  However, I disagree with this thinking- accepting help is absolutely not a sign of weakness, and is crucial to help maintain your sanity during the newborn fug.  In fact, it can be quite liberating to say yes!  People will want to help you, and it will also make them feel good if you accept it!

Let me know if you decide to give this a go in the comments or head over to my website www.medicmummy.com 🙂