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How we do Date Night

1
 

There are zero chances of a spontaneous night out with your spouse when you have three kids, well not in our house anyway. Date nights are scheduled months in advance to allow time to butter up family members to have three children over night and then give weekly reminders so the date cannot go forgotten or end up being double booked.

Without fail, somewhere between 48 and 72 hours before the sleep over which at least one of our three children now does not want to go on, something will come up. Someone will start sneezing, have a tummy ache,

SelfishMother.com
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a mild temperature, the hot water supply where they are due to be staying has stopped working, an act of God means a plague of locus have invaded.

I then have fleeting thoughts of cancelling but it will be months to reschedule, I have attended a hair removal appointment and have already decided what I want from the Thai menu. So instead I pack extra jumpers and Calpol and drop them off saying they don’t need a bath but there are some wet wipes in the bag. Phew.

On our most recent date night we then had 2 hours of actual time alone in the house

SelfishMother.com
3
before needing to leave for the restaurant. 2 adults, alone in the house and slightly giddy about the prospect of a whole childless night. Things are getting exciting. Naturally the first thought is bed. But to nap or to read?

He is going to remain downstairs catching up on some work and listening to the football. I was concerned that a nap my just accidentally turn into a really early night so decided to read. What a luxury, uninterrupted reading during daylight hours, the decadence! The labour of love that is The Testaments is the book of choice. I

SelfishMother.com
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set my alarm to remind me I need to brush my teeth and hair and maybe even change in about an hour. Just before it goes off my husband appears at the door. I am furious as its all getting a bit good in the book. He suggests we put back table reservations by an hour as he is busy finishing something and clearly I am now enjoying my book. I am thrilled and just know this is why I married him. He calls and changes the booking, I reset my alarm.

Eventually we have to leave the house. It feels like a struggle and we discuss take-away but there are cinema

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tickets booked and we agree we can fall asleep in front of the TV any night of the week so we should stick to our plans and go out the door.

Dinner is delicious. We eat slowly, chew a lot. We remain seated for the whole meal; no one needs a drink or has spilt something. I remember it’s nice to eat without having to bribe anyone and that actually; him and me do have quite a lot of fun when we get the chance. We laugh quite a bit, then grumble slightly, then laugh again. We don’t really talk about the kids. Except when I receive the message that two

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of our three are in bed asleep. The numbers are in our favour. I say thanks for letting me know and that we are about to go into a film so my phone will be on silent.

The film is excellent. We sneakily whisper to one another at various points during it to confirm our predictions, because something surprises us or because we got the coffee Revel. Then we chat and buzz all the way home, as the film was just so good. (He is driving, I have had wine, the chat and the buzz could be slightly one sided).

Back home and I dive straight back into bed. He

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follows me up and says he is just going to finish sealing round the bath (not a euphemism) before the kids are back tomorrow. Lovely I say and at some point fall asleep face deep in Gilead. I wake up to a hot coffee on the bedside table and a watertight bathroom.

This is how we do Date Night.

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wordswithmrsh

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- 8 Oct 19

 

There are zero chances of a spontaneous night out with your spouse when you have three kids, well not in our house anyway. Date nights are scheduled months in advance to allow time to butter up family members to have three children over night and then give weekly reminders so the date cannot go forgotten or end up being double booked.

Without fail, somewhere between 48 and 72 hours before the sleep over which at least one of our three children now does not want to go on, something will come up. Someone will start sneezing, have a tummy ache, a mild temperature, the hot water supply where they are due to be staying has stopped working, an act of God means a plague of locus have invaded.

I then have fleeting thoughts of cancelling but it will be months to reschedule, I have attended a hair removal appointment and have already decided what I want from the Thai menu. So instead I pack extra jumpers and Calpol and drop them off saying they don’t need a bath but there are some wet wipes in the bag. Phew.

On our most recent date night we then had 2 hours of actual time alone in the house before needing to leave for the restaurant. 2 adults, alone in the house and slightly giddy about the prospect of a whole childless night. Things are getting exciting. Naturally the first thought is bed. But to nap or to read?

He is going to remain downstairs catching up on some work and listening to the football. I was concerned that a nap my just accidentally turn into a really early night so decided to read. What a luxury, uninterrupted reading during daylight hours, the decadence! The labour of love that is The Testaments is the book of choice. I set my alarm to remind me I need to brush my teeth and hair and maybe even change in about an hour. Just before it goes off my husband appears at the door. I am furious as its all getting a bit good in the book. He suggests we put back table reservations by an hour as he is busy finishing something and clearly I am now enjoying my book. I am thrilled and just know this is why I married him. He calls and changes the booking, I reset my alarm.

Eventually we have to leave the house. It feels like a struggle and we discuss take-away but there are cinema tickets booked and we agree we can fall asleep in front of the TV any night of the week so we should stick to our plans and go out the door.

Dinner is delicious. We eat slowly, chew a lot. We remain seated for the whole meal; no one needs a drink or has spilt something. I remember it’s nice to eat without having to bribe anyone and that actually; him and me do have quite a lot of fun when we get the chance. We laugh quite a bit, then grumble slightly, then laugh again. We don’t really talk about the kids. Except when I receive the message that two of our three are in bed asleep. The numbers are in our favour. I say thanks for letting me know and that we are about to go into a film so my phone will be on silent.

The film is excellent. We sneakily whisper to one another at various points during it to confirm our predictions, because something surprises us or because we got the coffee Revel. Then we chat and buzz all the way home, as the film was just so good. (He is driving, I have had wine, the chat and the buzz could be slightly one sided).

Back home and I dive straight back into bed. He follows me up and says he is just going to finish sealing round the bath (not a euphemism) before the kids are back tomorrow. Lovely I say and at some point fall asleep face deep in Gilead. I wake up to a hot coffee on the bedside table and a watertight bathroom.

This is how we do Date Night.

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wordswithmrsh

Mum of three fabulous children, wife to one very patient husband. My blogs are about anything that has popped into my head as it occurs to me. I have aspirations to write more, that are slowly turning into reality. A lover of the simple things in life - good friends, good food, good wine and of course family.

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