“Meet the year 7 tutor” evening (or as I like to call it, “Hit me with it, I can take it”)

Carron Stacey - 3 Oct 17

When the boy was in Year 1, I used to ask him regularly, “Are you on the flames dear?” (the flames being the negative, dark, bottom part of the behaviour chart). Once, he was even threatened with not attending his own birthday party if he was on those flaming flames. Luckily, his teacher talked me out of banning him from his own do – something about “having made the right choices – eventually”.

As the negative flames and the positive (rocket?) side of the chart made way for more age-appropriate representations, he still continued to dabble in the dark side. (Notice how I struggle to remember if the positive behaviour symbol is a rocket?! Says lots.) On his entrance into Year 3 (new school), his “name was taken down” for starting a conga line in a phonics lesson. I tried not to snigger when informed; luckily the teacher found it funny, albeit inappropriate.

Fast forward to Year 6 and a threat of not earning enough points for an end of year trip to the park with pizza wasn’t enough. He didn’t want to go to the park; it was “pathetic” anyway. It didn’t help that this was after SATS results and a week-long transition period at the new secondary school. After a few days of living dangerously close to not attending the trip, he did himself proud and earned enough points to take the whole class.

So now today, in Year 7, we have the first “Meet the tutor” conference. I was sure it was going to be cancelled, as the school were OFSTEDed yesterday and today, but we are informed on entry into the school, that “The children come first; it’s a normal school day”. We look, me feeling slightly nervous, at all the name cards on the desks put out in the hall. Secondary teachers are a world apart from primary. They wear heels and smart suits! There are lots of male teachers! We take our seats.

“There’s been an incident,” she starts with. “You will have received an email from me.” (Still haven’t as yet, but hey.) While our hearts sink, it’s some minor name calling incident which has been dealt with by the group of kids themselves, and the boy is friends again with the one called names. My old fear of “Prison calling” returns…

It turns out that he’s made a good start. He’s very quiet in tutor group, sitting near to – but not talking to – a group of Year 9 girls. He doesn’t have many friends in his tutor group, mostly just in his class.

We leave with the assurance that we can touch base with her to check how he’s doing, before his first official report comes through before Christmas. I wonder what his score for his “attitude towards learning” will be…

Carron Stacey

Carron Stacey, a late-40s mum who works in school to keep her sanity. Enjoys the beach and the humdrum things in life. Mum to a tweenie boy, living on the coast in the UK.

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