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At the school gate a Mum pointed to me and my middle son and asked her daughter: “What does his Mummy do?” Her daughter replied, “Oh she’s like you Mummy, she does nothing.” Neither this layabout Mother, nor her traitor daughter, noticed that I had overheard this dispiriting exchange.
So as I stood, with one son and the toddler on the back of the bike, doing nothing, except waiting for my eldest son, I realised she was right. My days as a Mother are punctuated with great holes of doing nothing. Space where I once was. Space now emptied
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of me and filled with nothing but love.
9.36-9.40am standing, waiting, doing nothing with keys, satchels, lunch boxes in hand, waiting for boys to thunder downstairs and off to school.
10.35-10.50am standing, waiting, doing nothing in the Post Office queue except trying to stop toddler eating sweet display.
11-11.30am sitting on tiny wooden chair, waiting, doing nothing, in the library while man with a guitar sings to toddlers.
12.30-12.45pm siting, waiting, doing nothing, smiling and waiting for the toddler to eat his lunch. Please just eat
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it. Please.
3.15-3.30pm standing, waiting with bike in playground for a supply teacher who doesn’t know what time school finishes.
5-5.45pm crouching, waiting, doing nothing, ant hunting with toddler, while boys have music lessons.
6-7.30pm standing, sitting, crouching, carrying, waiting, doing nothing, watching free-range / can’t-take-your-eyes-off-for-one-minute toddler whilst the boys have cricket.
7.45pm – 8pm kneeling, waiting, doing nothing while toddler has a bath.
Whole days pass where I do nothing whatsoever at all.
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Joanna Gray - 4 May 17
At the school gate a Mum pointed to me and my middle son and asked her daughter: “What does his Mummy do?” Her daughter replied, “Oh she’s like you Mummy, she does nothing.” Neither this layabout Mother, nor her traitor daughter, noticed that I had overheard this dispiriting exchange.
So as I stood, with one son and the toddler on the back of the bike, doing nothing, except waiting for my eldest son, I realised she was right. My days as a Mother are punctuated with great holes of doing nothing. Space where I once was. Space now emptied of me and filled with nothing but love.
9.36-9.40am standing, waiting, doing nothing with keys, satchels, lunch boxes in hand, waiting for boys to thunder downstairs and off to school.
10.35-10.50am standing, waiting, doing nothing in the Post Office queue except trying to stop toddler eating sweet display.
11-11.30am sitting on tiny wooden chair, waiting, doing nothing, in the library while man with a guitar sings to toddlers.
12.30-12.45pm siting, waiting, doing nothing, smiling and waiting for the toddler to eat his lunch. Please just eat it. Please.
3.15-3.30pm standing, waiting with bike in playground for a supply teacher who doesn’t know what time school finishes.
5-5.45pm crouching, waiting, doing nothing, ant hunting with toddler, while boys have music lessons.
6-7.30pm standing, sitting, crouching, carrying, waiting, doing nothing, watching free-range / can’t-take-your-eyes-off-for-one-minute toddler whilst the boys have cricket.
7.45pm – 8pm kneeling, waiting, doing nothing while toddler has a bath.
Whole days pass where I do nothing whatsoever at all.
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