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The mum who aces it all

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One thing I really regret from when B was little is that I tried so hard to be the mum that aced it all. It was part of the drive to go back to work full time. Looking back, it was probably one of the things that led to my post natal anxiety. I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist, always wanted to win at the things I do. Passing my driving test was a real learning curve for me as it took me 4 attempts. So when I became a mum I suppose it was natural that I wanted to ace at this as well.
I loved being on maternity leave. I loved the groups, the
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snuggly days in and the walks along the prom. Prior to being on maternity leave I’d been just as passionate about my job. It didn’t occur to me that it would be different, that I would be different. I hit the ground running, determined to make up for the lost time while I’d been with my baby, adamant that my career path would not be altered.
And it wasn’t just work and motherhood. Home. Relationship. Family. Friends. Myself. I wanted to ace at all of those things because I thought that was the type of Mum that B needed. What I now realise is that B
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needed a healthy mum. A happy mum. A mum who knows how to prioritise, how to let things go, how to relax. Some days I’ll ace at work. Some days I’ll ace at housework. Some days I’ll ace at being a wife, a sister, a friend. But rarely will I ace them all in the same day. (Let’s be honest I’d be knackered!) So my outlook is a little different now. My expectations have changed. As long as the kids and I are healthy and happy, then I’m happy to be the mum that doesn’t ace at everything. Not in the same day anyway. 💚
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Julie Suffield

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- 21 Sep 19

One thing I really regret from when B was little is that I tried so hard to be the mum that aced it all. It was part of the drive to go back to work full time. Looking back, it was probably one of the things that led to my post natal anxiety. I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist, always wanted to win at the things I do. Passing my driving test was a real learning curve for me as it took me 4 attempts. So when I became a mum I suppose it was natural that I wanted to ace at this as well.

I loved being on maternity leave. I loved the groups, the snuggly days in and the walks along the prom. Prior to being on maternity leave I’d been just as passionate about my job. It didn’t occur to me that it would be different, that I would be different. I hit the ground running, determined to make up for the lost time while I’d been with my baby, adamant that my career path would not be altered.

And it wasn’t just work and motherhood. Home. Relationship. Family. Friends. Myself. I wanted to ace at all of those things because I thought that was the type of Mum that B needed. What I now realise is that B needed a healthy mum. A happy mum. A mum who knows how to prioritise, how to let things go, how to relax. Some days I’ll ace at work. Some days I’ll ace at housework. Some days I’ll ace at being a wife, a sister, a friend. But rarely will I ace them all in the same day. (Let’s be honest I’d be knackered!) So my outlook is a little different now. My expectations have changed. As long as the kids and I are healthy and happy, then I’m happy to be the mum that doesn’t ace at everything. Not in the same day anyway. 💚

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Julie Suffield

Lancashire born Liverpool based mum to two preschoolers. Blogging about motherhood, family life, being a working mum, local interest and mental health.

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