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The Shared Leave Mum (shared paternal leave)

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Ah Maternity leave, ask most dads and they will properly say us mums have it easy. They think its all coffee shops and play time but we know it can be a different story.

Shared paternity leave is becoming more common and easier for couples these days but it’s an option many still chose not to take.

In Norway, Iceland and Sweden a massive 80% of couples choose to have shared leave compared to our 2% but then again men do get 3 months of leave paid at 90 -100% of there wages, why wouldn’t you?

Is it all about the money? I know if my husband

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could have had 3 months off with full pay he would have jumped at it and would have got to experience the lovely first 3 months of our children.
The standard choice most make is 2 weeks full pay for the dad but the option to take a month if they use their holidays.

 With a cut in pay with mum being off the pull to go back to work is strong now they have an extra mouth to feed. Shared leave helps family financially so why are we not choosing this as an option? Well for a start the government have to have to become more flexible with childcare options

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and funding so more families have the ability to find a good work/home balance but the truth in the matter is most families just cant afford it. In Norway children are given free full time childcare spaces as soon as they turn one meaning the mother doesn’t have to make the decision of changing her work roles for her child, unless she wants too.

With mothers are still seen as the main caregivers but we need more male role models to help change these dated ideas otherwise we are going to really struggle to make any changes in this field. Shared

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responsibilities are a huge factor in helping women equality in the work place, creating high powered women that can move past the stereotype that once they have children they cant have a career/move up the ranks.

Mum guilt is real – I know, believe me but in many countries the workday is shorter and the idea of staying late is not a thing. How many of you have felt awful leaving work “early” to pick up the kids and then have felt awful as your child is the last to be picked up…again. The stress of it all is enough for you to give up work

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completely, something has to give.

The push the government have been giving this campaign is all very well and good but it’s a show as the real facts of it all is, it just doesn’t work for most people.

Who does it work for though? It wouldn’t work for me as we would be at a place that we would not be able to pay our bills because well I just don’t make as much as my husband…not even close. My hours would be long and I just wouldn’t see my children and I am sorry but I had children so I could enjoy them…I would rather be poor.

Let

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me know what you think, have you and your partner had shared leave? What were your experiences or were you like me and this was never an option you could take.

Please feel free to check out my other posts at www.mumforce.co.uk

My Instagram @Mumforce

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- 12 May 18

Ah Maternity leave, ask most dads and they will properly say us mums have it easy. They think its all coffee shops and play time but we know it can be a different story.

Shared paternity leave is becoming more common and easier for couples these days but it’s an option many still chose not to take.

In Norway, Iceland and Sweden a massive 80% of couples choose to have shared leave compared to our 2% but then again men do get 3 months of leave paid at 90 -100% of there wages, why wouldn’t you?

Is it all about the money? I know if my husband could have had 3 months off with full pay he would have jumped at it and would have got to experience the lovely first 3 months of our children.
The standard choice most make is 2 weeks full pay for the dad but the option to take a month if they use their holidays.

 With a cut in pay with mum being off the pull to go back to work is strong now they have an extra mouth to feed. Shared leave helps family financially so why are we not choosing this as an option? Well for a start the government have to have to become more flexible with childcare options and funding so more families have the ability to find a good work/home balance but the truth in the matter is most families just cant afford it. In Norway children are given free full time childcare spaces as soon as they turn one meaning the mother doesn’t have to make the decision of changing her work roles for her child, unless she wants too.

With mothers are still seen as the main caregivers but we need more male role models to help change these dated ideas otherwise we are going to really struggle to make any changes in this field. Shared responsibilities are a huge factor in helping women equality in the work place, creating high powered women that can move past the stereotype that once they have children they cant have a career/move up the ranks.

Mum guilt is real – I know, believe me but in many countries the workday is shorter and the idea of staying late is not a thing. How many of you have felt awful leaving work “early” to pick up the kids and then have felt awful as your child is the last to be picked up…again. The stress of it all is enough for you to give up work completely, something has to give.

The push the government have been giving this campaign is all very well and good but it’s a show as the real facts of it all is, it just doesn’t work for most people.

Who does it work for though? It wouldn’t work for me as we would be at a place that we would not be able to pay our bills because well I just don’t make as much as my husband…not even close. My hours would be long and I just wouldn’t see my children and I am sorry but I had children so I could enjoy them…I would rather be poor.

Let me know what you think, have you and your partner had shared leave? What were your experiences or were you like me and this was never an option you could take.

Please feel free to check out my other posts at www.mumforce.co.uk

My Instagram @Mumforce

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Gail aka Mumforce, is a Scottish lifestyle / parenting blogger and a mum of two, based in Edinburgh. After giving birth to 2 little darlings Gail focussed some attention towards rediscovering/discovering herself. Being a daughter, sister, friend, wife and mother can take a lot out of the best of us. Whilst in amongst/ dealing with all the unpredictability’s in life it’s an easy thing to go into pilot mode/ forget to catch your breath and although bringing up another human being is arguably one of the most difficult challenges a human can be blessed with – “it can often be the case the we want more in respect to purpose, something that is just me”. Gail is open about her mental health and hopes that through writing, honestly about her experiences she can allow others to open up and no longer feel alone. As well as talking/writing about her struggles with mental health, Gail blogs about daily life, women’s rights and issues that some are afraid to address. Throw in a few family outing reviews, product reviews and mum fashion and we have a very mixed bag which truly represents the addictive randomness that is Mumforce. ​To begin with Gail found writing as a form of therapy and a hobby however through her literacy journey Gail’s lifelong pursuit of seeking acceptance has been redefined – “ I finally understood that it was self acceptance that was being sought and have since embraced every ounce of human emotion and solidified its presence through my words”. A unique character who we can all relate to who gives a fantastic reflection of the main battle we have in life, “the person staring back at me in the mirror”.

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