This too shall pass

Hannah Deacon - 20 Nov 18

I haven’t been here for a while, Hello. I’ve been a bit busy: I went through my second pregnancy, all the while trying to sell our house, only for the two to culminate on the same weekend at the end of June, moving house and welcoming our second daughter in one weekend.

So now I thought I’d just share a little bit of my experience of parenting since that fateful weekend; the parenting of two tiny terrors of my own making…

First, a little bit of backstory… my first was a preemie, born at 30 weeks, that only came home with us after 5 weeks in hospital. So we had a very different introduction to parenting than many; supervised at all times (it seemed) for that first month or so, and following a strict regime of sleeping and feeding for those following, until one day, she ate, she napped, she slept all night and everything was pretty easy going.

Not so much this time around.

These regular baby thingys are a bit trickier if you ask me.

She has her own thoughts on the matter. And those thoughts are that we should all be awake…

Now, if she had been my first baby, I feel this would have been easier to deal with for a variety of reasons, namely a) I wouldn’t know anything else, b) I’d have time to “sleep when the baby sleeps” during the day because, c) I wouldn’t be trying to deal with a shouting, shrieking, stomping, tantruming two-year-old at the same time!

And to be honest that last point is at the real crux of the matter. Parenting two kids that want very different things all at the same time is HARD. It is tough going. Everyone wants food at the same time, or the toddler wants the toilet while the baby is breastfeeding, or the toddler just needs your attention, or she wants to throw a tantrum, especially when you’re just trying to get the baby to sleep. Frankly me and her just aren’t getting on at the minute, which I guess is mainly down to the fact that she is no longer the main focus of my attention. And it makes me feel bad. I feel bad that she feels bad, and I feel bad that I shout at her after her asking her ad infinitum to follow the simplest instructions for me, and I feel bad that she still can’t communicate her feelings well enough that it all just ends in screaming, from everyone.

I know it’s not forever, and I haven’t really any wisdom to share, I just needed to vent a little bit and maybe let anyone else struggling that they are most definitely not on their own. I guess we just need to tell ourselves that everything is a phase. This too shall pass.

Hannah Deacon

Hannah Deacon is mum to one Rainbow Baby, Isla, and is currently a stay at home mum. Lover of food, clothes and the occasional glass of vino, you can also check out her Instagram if you're interested.

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