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What Village?

1
They say it takes a village to raise a child.

Recently there was a campaign on Instagram of women all doing peace signs and singing the praises of their own personal villages. And I totally love that, don’t get me wrong, I dig women empowering each other and feeling supported and kicking life where it hurts.

It’s just, with a bit of thought, it left me feeling cold. I didn’t feel like I could join in and feel #blessed with them.

What if you don’t have a village? What if you don’t have a wealth of support around you? What if you don’t have

SelfishMother.com
2
grandparents to take the kids for sleepovers  – or just a few hours? What if you don’t have close friends to take turns holding playdates with? Or even a trusted babysitter you can rely on?

What if your only chance to recover from being overwhelmed and touched-out and talked-out is when the kids are asleep and let’s face it, you should be too?

The last time I went out out with my partner, I shit you not, was to see Sex and the City 2, and we all know what a fucking let down that was.

What if you are the village? What if it’s all down to you

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3
indefinitely, forever and ever, amen? I’m not trying to sound like a martyr, I’m just saying for a lot of us, that’s just what life is.

My family are scattered all over the place and are so fractured I can no longer keep up with who is talking to who – or in most cases, not talking to who. And yes I have friends, who I can send smoke signals to in times of crisis but at the same time they have their own shit to deal with and I totally respect that and don’t want to add to their problems.

As for blogging, I’ve been dipping my toe back in the

SelfishMother.com
4
pool of writing stuff and getting out there and talking bollocks on Twitter and doing carefully thought out, arty photos for the grid, but the community spirit I loved a few years ago just seems stale and a bit broken tbf.

So I guess what I’m saying is – where else is the village? Is it just an exclusive club if you’ve got over 10k Instagram followers?

SelfishMother.com

By

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- 18 Apr 18

They say it takes a village to raise a child.

Recently there was a campaign on Instagram of women all doing peace signs and singing the praises of their own personal villages. And I totally love that, don’t get me wrong, I dig women empowering each other and feeling supported and kicking life where it hurts.

It’s just, with a bit of thought, it left me feeling cold. I didn’t feel like I could join in and feel #blessed with them.

What if you don’t have a village? What if you don’t have a wealth of support around you? What if you don’t have grandparents to take the kids for sleepovers  – or just a few hours? What if you don’t have close friends to take turns holding playdates with? Or even a trusted babysitter you can rely on?

What if your only chance to recover from being overwhelmed and touched-out and talked-out is when the kids are asleep and let’s face it, you should be too?

The last time I went out out with my partner, I shit you not, was to see Sex and the City 2, and we all know what a fucking let down that was.

What if you are the village? What if it’s all down to you indefinitely, forever and ever, amen? I’m not trying to sound like a martyr, I’m just saying for a lot of us, that’s just what life is.

My family are scattered all over the place and are so fractured I can no longer keep up with who is talking to who – or in most cases, not talking to who. And yes I have friends, who I can send smoke signals to in times of crisis but at the same time they have their own shit to deal with and I totally respect that and don’t want to add to their problems.

As for blogging, I’ve been dipping my toe back in the pool of writing stuff and getting out there and talking bollocks on Twitter and doing carefully thought out, arty photos for the grid, but the community spirit I loved a few years ago just seems stale and a bit broken tbf.

So I guess what I’m saying is – where else is the village? Is it just an exclusive club if you’ve got over 10k Instagram followers?

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