You’re running like a girl

Runninglikeagirl - 1 Mar 16

Running like a girl
“You are running like a girl” I actually overheard this sentence used to a boy this week and it has completely thrown my mind into a spin. This sentence obviously meant as an insult, stayed with me and I find myself coming back to it over and over again.

What did they mean to say? What is the equivalent to say to a girl?

You are dancing like a boy?

You are playing like a boy?

You’re doing maths homework like a boy?

Being compared to a boy seems to create a picture of strength, energy and confidence. Yet an insult comparing a run or a throw to a girls run or throw, is clearly meant to conjure an image of weakness, lack of coordination and insecurity.

It makes me incredibly sad as a mother and as a teacher, that our children are still being exposed to a sentence such as ‘You are running like a girl’ as an insult with the images and metaphors that being compared to a girl is a bad thing.

My sadness and reflection on this phrase sits in two places, firstly with the grown ups that are using these phrases. How sad that no one has edited that sentence out of them, stopped them and challenged it’s use.

Reflecting on this phrase makes me sad for both boys and girls that are growing up hearing them. As a mother of two boys and a girl, I find the way people talk about gender fascinating.
Most people I meet seem to have put boys in the swinging from the beams, physical camp and the girls in the sit still and colour in camp. My daughter is only small and yet I am met with “Oh isn’t it so different’ well no, my 4 month old baby likes milk, sleep and rolling over. I can’t see boy traits or girl traits. My eldest did not crawl like a boy or play like a girl. Last night one of my children stuck in stickers for 40 minutes and one sung eternal flame to the baby was that like a girl or like a boy? As a girl who enjoyed sport, I actually hope my son does run like a girl and a strong, confident one at that.

I am no expert on gender and there will be many more experienced voices in the world of gender and parenting, but having my daughter has made me reflect on the messages we give to our children, both our boys and our girls.

I hope we can all challenge phrases like ‘you’re running like a girl’ and spin it 180 degrees:

“You are running like a girl”
“Great, I must be ________*
*Fill in the one that suits best: fast, determined, strong, competitive, an athlete…

Runninglikeagirl

...trying to navigate the roadmap of life as a female, as a mother, as a wife, as a sister, as a daughter, and as a friend. A guidebook would have helped, yet some wisdom appearing with age. Three children & a husband are travelling along with me.

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